The End

Our last day. The end of two months travelling four countries in Southeast Asia. Tonight at 4AM we will be picked up, taken to Bangkok airport, and we will fly home.

The day began with rain, but the bad weather was over after breakfast. Rachelle had a more conventional waffles and fruit, whereas I went for burger and chips. I've never had that for breakfast before. The rest of the morning and early afternoon were spent wandering around the streets looking at market stalls and shops to pick up a few last things. Then we rode in a Tuk-Tuk to the Siam Paragon. It's the place we saw Harry Potter in the big shopping mall. To be honest, we pretty much did the same things we did last time we were at the mall. We ate Burger King, looked around the shops and went to the cinema. The film watched was Transformers 3. Rachelle wanted to see The Deathly Hallows Part II again, but I recommended something to make the mall experience ever so slightly different from last time. Transformers wasn't very good in my opinion; lacked a good story. It was all just action sequences. Maybe we should have just watched Harry Potter again.

Our last ever Tuk-Tuk ride in Southeast Asia took us back to the guesthouse. It was dinner time and we ate at a restaurant called The Macaroni Club. The last time we ate there was, in fact, the first time we ate on our trip. When we landed in Bangkok, two months ago, The Macaroni Club was our first Asian dining experience, and now it's also our last. I had Thai Yellow Curry. Rachelle and I spent most of the time being sad about having to leave this world behind us.

The flight is at 6:50AM, but with the taxi to the airport leaving at 4AM, it made sense to us to try and stay awake through the night. Hopefully, this would also help us get over jet lag when back in England. To end the trip then, we went to Khaosan Road, to a bar; yet, it wasn't the conventional kind. A wooden kiosk with plastic chairs in front of it, and foldable tables, plonked on the pavement. Rachelle ordered a cocktail that she didn't like and I had myself a Chang beer. An Asian girl on the table next to us asked Rachelle something about a photograph. It was loud so we couldn't hear, but assumed she wanted us to take a photograph of her and her friends, so we said yes. Then the girl leaned in towards Rachelle and her friends took a photograph of the two of them. Asians taking photographs of Rachelle has happened too many times over the past two months with no explanation as to why. Therefore, we took our last opportunity to ask. The Asian girl said it's because Rachelle is so beautiful. So there you have it; mystery solved. I should have known.

The Asian girl turned out to be weird after talking with her. In her defence, she was probably just drunk, but we decided to leave the kiosk bar and go to a real bar. Rachelle and I shared a jug of Chang beer. We watched the Khaosan Road at night. It's full of intoxicated westerners and Asians alike. When it was really late, we hung out in our guesthouse room until it was time to take the taxi to the airport.

We left Bangkok in the night. The trip ended. Our time as travellers is over, and I will never ever forget it. And that's that.

Bangkok Part III

The last thing Rachelle and I want to do today is leave Koh Tao, but it's out of our hands. Bangkok is calling us back, for one last time. Our flight leaves on the 26th and we need to depart from the beautiful island today. The morning ferry was very nice. Much better than the other ferries we've had to take. It had a television that played old Americas Funniest Videos episodes. There was some funny stuff. The boat only took 3 hours to find the mainland. From there we took an 8 hour bus to Bangkok. The bus was also nice and played pirated DVD's; recent cinema releases including Battle Los Angeles and Tron. However, they had the sound volume too low so there was no point unless you can lip read, which I can't.

We arrived at around 9PM and chose the guesthouse we used last time; it's on the street parallel to Khaosan Road. I suggested we eat on Khaosan. I was wrong to. It's great for nightlife, but trying to hold a conversation in a restaurant-bar that is blasting through the decibels is more than difficult. The food was pants too. 

Tired from the journey, we dragged ourselves to bed. It's very sad to think that we are at our final destination before flying home.

Massages And Ladyboys

The weather today is much better than yesterday. The rain has stopped, the ground is dry again, and the grey blanket has thinned. There are still clouds up in the sky, but the sun can get through enough to make it quite warm. For both convenience and cost, we ate at our accommodation’s restaurant. After breakfast we strolled down the beach and found ourselves a nice spot. Again, there was plenty of space, because the beach isn't busy. I find it strange that on all the beaches we've been to in Southeast Asia, people don't seem to occupy them until after lunch. It's a good thing for us; I just find it strange. We sunbathed for two hours even though the sun wasn't especially strong. I read my book; the one I bought from Bangkok the last time we were there.

After lunch we lounged by the pool. It was not the nicest looking pool: The water was a little murky. I went in it anyway. Another couple of hours and Rachelle is feeling restless, wanting to get up and do something. Rachelle likes ice cream, and eating some seemed an adequate endeavour to keep her happy. There is an ice cream parlour that we spotted yesterday and we decide to go there. Rachelle had a chocolate brownie ice cream sandwich and I had a Sundae.

One of the most thriving street-shop businesses in Southeast Asia seems to be massage. They have parlours on every road. Apart from the unwanted massage in the restaurant in Ho Chi Minh (and I don't think it really counts) we haven't had one. I think, however, that it is important we experience a traditional Asian massage in Asia. And so we do. We both opt for the Thai massage. They give me strange baggy bottoms to put on. Rachelle did too, but also received a baggy top. I lie down on a mattress, Rachelle is lying on the one next to me, and a stocky Thai lady begins rubbing, poking and pulling my arms, legs, head and back. I'll admit I was a little scared and kept my eyes closed the entire time, only occasionally peering over at Rachelle to see how hers was getting on. It was an experience, and my body joints cracked a few times, which I presume is a good thing. I don't think I felt much different afterwards though. Maybe the effects can't be felt. To finish, they gave us some kind of herbal drink. The drink was nice. It all lasted about an hour.

At a beach bar we hung out, I read and had a drink. The daily monsoon poured down and we waited for the storm to pass before looking for a worthy restaurant. The restaurant opposite our accommodation has an all-you-can-eat pizza offer. When we sit down, there is a conversation struggle with the non-English speaking waitress about how it works; I'm used to a buffet-style operation, but the process they implement here is very different. Waiters and waitresses walk around the tables that have opted for the AYCE whenever a fresh pizza has been baked and they hand everyone a slice. It's good because you don't have to move, but you can't choose the pizza type and you have to wait for them to come round. Rachelle didn't like having to wait to eat more. I didn't mind.

In the evening we headed to a couple of bars. One on the beach and one not. Opposite the latter of the bars, Rachelle and I noticed a strange and somewhat scary place. It was another bar, but ladyboy employees were outside trying to attract people inside. A sign above said 'Ladyboy Show Every Night'. I was surprised to see so many people - men, women and children - going inside. I was very two minded about the thought of going in: On the one hand, I find it strange, but on the other, ladyboy culture is very prominent in Thailand and maybe it would be cultural to see what it's all about.

I immediately regretted being there. It was too weird for me, and too weird for Rachelle too. Ladyboy waiters, or waitresses, or whatever they are, serve drinks from a very expensive menu whilst her (or his?) colleagues are on stage, dancing and miming to pop songs. They couldn't dance in time with each other, and most of them couldn't mime in sync with the songs. I felt sorry for them: The westerners inside the bar hadn't come for the quality of the performance; they were there to see a freak show. Rachelle and I swiftly left after glugging down one drink.

Underwater World

Today we are going to the other side of the island: The western side with the long stretch of beach and the town. Before doing so, we want to enjoy the morning in Tanote Bay and therefore book the taxi for 1PM. At breakfast we ate fruit salads with yoghurt, mine came with honey too. Once our plates were empty it was on to the beach. After some morning relaxing, we hire snorkeling masks to see what fish occupy the corals. They turned out to be the best corals either of us have ever seen.

There was a lot more coral than we had first thought, and not only that, but a lot more fish. All sorts of fish, all sorts of colours and sizes. Rachelle saw an eel and a school of big fish that scared her. She said they looked like they had teeth. They probably didn't. I regret not doing this all yesterday when we had the whole day. It was like visiting an aquarium and being allowed into the pools, only it wasn't artificial. It was seeing another world. Wanting a break from snorkeling, I went towards the boulders that are out on the bay. When I stepped foot on them, many iridescently coloured crabs scuttled away to hide from me. They didn't hide very well and I could see them under the rocks. I decided that I must get Rachelle to come and look, so I did. We hung out on the rocks and then time was getting on. I looked at the biggest of the boulders, the one that you can climb up and jump off, and realised that it was now or never.

The climb to the top was harder than I imagined. After climbing up the bottom part, you have to use a rope to pull yourself to the top, up the steep surface. My feet were getting small cuts. I walked to where you could jump off, the height must have been around 8 metres, maybe more, and Rachelle was swimming, waiting to watch me jump. I know now, and I knew at the time, that what I did next was lame. I decided to pretend I was in The Beach, jumping off of the big rock just before Richard, Etienne and Francoise find the secret beach. The jump was exhilarating. Then it was a rushed swim back to get the taxi to Sairee Beach.

Our luck had us arrive on the other side of the island just as a storm began. We had to walk up the long street that runs parallel with the beach, looking for a place to stay. Nowhere seemed to have room, at least not in our budget. It was worrying when a guy at a diving resort told Rachelle that most places were full and we'd need to find somewhere soon, before the next ferries of new arrivals snatch up the last of what's left. We swiftly picked up our game and plodded through the rain.

Our luck changed for the better; thanks to Rachelle's suggestion to walk down a street I didn't like the look of, we ended up being taken to a beach side resort with pool. They had a bungalow available for an agreeable 700 Baht per night (around 14 pounds). Relieved and very happy with the accommodation, we take a breather before heading out in the rain to find somewhere to eat. We chose Thai food.

The weather didn't improve very much. It stopped raining, but the skies remained dull and a cooling breeze never ceased. It was a nice temperature, but not tropical. After a walk along the beach, we rested in the room, watching television, getting ready for the evening. For dinner I had enchiladas and Rachelle a salad at a restaurant playing the movie Hangover 2. It was the same pirated quality we had watched in Sihanoukville. Down at the beach were fires shows and bars where we had a couple of drinks. The fire shows were substandard and I feel I have seen enough of them now to make a qualified judgement.

Dinosaur Island

For some reason a woman screamed and it woke most people on our side of the room up. It's early, around 5:40AM, and out of the boat window I can see Koh Tao. We still have a while to wait before we dock. I feel sticky, tired and disgusted by the conditions I've slept in. At least it's almost over and I can shower when we find a room.

Koh Tao is a bigger island than Koh Phi Phi. It's supposedly the island for diving and snorkeling, situated in the Gulf of Thailand above Koh Samui and Koh Phangan. My first impression of the landscape was Jurassic. Smooth, giant boulders are all over the hills, poking out of the green forest that coats the island. It's hard to describe why that made it look 'Jurassic', but it just did. 

When we get ourselves off the boat and onto the island, we realised we had no idea where we wanted to go. The main strip of beach and all the bars and restaurants are on the west side of the island. However, it's not necessarily the nicest strip of beach and Rachelle reckons we head to one of the smaller, quieter beaches on the east, because they are supposedly better. After much deliberation we chose Tanote Bay. We weren't sure if it was possible to walk there but not being sure meant it was wiser to take a taxi. The taxis here are all pick-up trucks. We didn't know why until making the journey to the east side: Steep hills and poor road surfaces. A Tuk-Tuk would fall apart on this terrain and it's a good job we didn't walk. The truck is an expensive ride and we wonder if we've been conned as new arrivals. It drops us off at a hotel that the driver said would be in our price range. It definitely wasn't. He refused to take us anywhere else without paying him more, but told us there were more places to stay on the beach itself, just a short walk away. We decided to give it a try.
 

It was a fairly short walk to the beach. However, it involved walking along a wooden bridge that didn't seem all that well built. Every step we took, with our heavy bags on our backs, made the planks of wood beneath give a little. There was serious risk of falling straight through. Our fears weren't put at ease after seeing one of the planks snapped by someone previously using the bridge, and I bet they didn't have this amount of baggage slung around them. Thankfully, we made it to the beach and found accommodation we could afford. 

We are staying in a bungalow on stilts. It overlooks the small beach and is a short walk down some steps onto the sand. In the sea is a collection of boulders, and one of them is especially large. Apparently you can jump from the top of it into the sea. I might try it. Our accommodation has a restaurant and the other two or three places to stay on this beach do too, but that's about all there is here. It's simplistic, tranquil, a getaway from all the noise.

Once settled into our room, we went for breakfast in the restaurant. Then we headed onto the beach to find ourselves a spot (not hard with noone on it). We sunbathed, swam in the sea and sunbathed some more. We made a mental note to rent snorkeling masks tomorrow, because there is heaps of coral in the sea and the clear water means we can see fish from above; imagine what could be seen with a snorkeling mask. The beach became a bit more crowded as the day went on, but not by much. It really is a lovely place to be. Rachelle and I prematurely agreed with each other that this is the best beach we have been to.

When the sun began to set, we went for food at a neighbouring hotel: Traitors to our own accommodation's restaurant I suppose. Then there was nothing to do. No nightlife in paradise. We were tired anyway and decided to get into bed and watch Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure on my iPod. Rachelle hadn't seen it before, but it is a most bodacious film. 

Travelers At Heart

The plan was to make the last week of our travels a relaxing holiday. We were going to stay on Koh Phi Phi and enjoy everything it has to offer us for a whole week. However, we are travelers and can't seem to stay in one place for very long anymore. We made the decision to go to one more island. Tonight we leave for Koh Tao, an island in the Gulf of Thailand.

We check-out of our hotel in the morning and leave our bags at the travel agency with whom we booked our journey. We're still entitled to use the hotel's pool, and that's what we do. The pool was busier today. Maybe a sign that it is a good time to leave the island. We don't like the crowds. It was nice relaxing in the sun. Rachelle was sure the pool bar did breakfast, so that was the plan. The pool bar didn't do breakfast. We had to eat Thai food as a morning meal.

At about 2PM, we packed our things, changed into clothes in the pool toilets, picked up some snacks from the 7-Eleven and went to the pier to wait for our boat. At 3:45PM we boarded and found seats. Then, off the ferry and onto a mini-bus for a short journey. Off the mini-bus and onto another for a much longer journey to Suratthani, where our night-ferry is waiting for us.

Rachelle, nor I, knew night-ferries even existed in this manner. It's another type of transport we can add to the list. However, it's not one we want to. The night-ferry is horrible. It's one big room with mattresses, laid side-by-side, along both walls. No dividers, just mattresses making one long bed. Above the mattresses are numbers, and these are the seat numbers (or bed numbers in this case). I worked out that it was about two and a half people per double mattress, and the mattresses were not very big. Forty people on each side of the boat. I'm not a particularly large person and I only just fit into a designated space. Of course, the fattest couple on the boat are next to me. We're all very squashed in. It wasn't even clean, nor was it air-conditioned. It was a nightmare and overtakes the sleeper-bus in the ranks of worst transport used in Southeast Asia.

The Beach

Today we are going on a boat tour around Koh Phi Phi. It doesn't start until 11AM, leaving us plenty of time to grab a bakery breakfast. We had donuts. Then we went to wait at the tour agency to get picked up. A woman on a bicycle came to collect us and we followed her all the way back to the beach which our hotel is on. We were given flippers for snorkeling and waited for others to arrive.

We get into a Long boat; the type of boat you'll almost definitely see in a holiday brochure for Thailand. It's a long, thin, wooden boat with an engine on the back. There are ten of us on the tour. Despite being the first people on the beach waiting, we are the last on the boat, meaning we are at the front. It's good for the view. Our first stop is Monkey Beach, but when we get there, we don't see any monkeys; just some Asians taking photographs of each other in the sea. The Long boat driver suggests we move on and we all agree. The second stop is a snorkeling spot. We already have our flippers and grab snorkeling masks from a box. I broke the first pair I picked up before even putting them on, but took another pair without anyone noticing me cause the damage. Rachelle and I jump in, and looking down, we didn't see much. A few Lion fish maybe, nothing more tropical than that. 

On the boat again and on our way to Maya Bay, things didn't feel so good. Both Rachelle and I had begun to feel sea-sick. The waters were very choppy and being at the front of the boat made it worse. We spent the short trip trying not to be ill, but made it to Maya Bay vomit-free. We were glad to have our feet on the ground. Our sea legs simply weren't with us today.

Maya Bay is on Koh Phi Phi Leh; a neighbouring island to Koh Phi Phi. It was the bay used in the film 'The Beach' - based on the Alex Garland novel I've been reading aloud to Rachelle throughout this trip. We take out our towels, I get out The Beach, ready to read, and we receive our included lunch from the boat driver. Then, out of nowhere, the sea struck. It came rushing towards us and caused ruin. My book was soaked, the dry towels were soaked and had sand washed upon them, Rachelle's lunch had been swallowed up, and the bag, with all our cameras and other belongings was wet too. How awfully inconvenient. I don't imagine Leonardo Dicaprio had to deal with this nonsense when filming. 

Maya Bay doesn't really look like it does in the film. It would be pretty if it wasn't for the tourist boats, tourists, rubbish floating around in the water and all our things being wet through. However, The Beach is one of my favourite films and it's nice to see the bay. We recovered from our incident and I read some of the book to Rachelle.

An hour at Maya Bay and we set off to another snorkeling spot. Again there wasn't a great array of fish, but there were lots and lots of Lion fish that came to swim around us. Tourism had them thinking we would bring bread to feed them, but we had none. After twenty minutes we set off for Pilah Lagoon. It's a lagoon surrounded by mountains and is filled with clear blue waters for swimming. I took the opportunity to dive from the Long boat. Rachelle captured it on camera. 

Next stop was Shark Point for more snorkeling. After about fifteen minutes, we had not seen any sharks and gave up - we still felt a little shaky from the sea and swimming wasn't helping. Some of the others did see sharks. Good for them. 

Our final stop was an hour on Mosquito Island. Despite it's name, it's a gorgeous island to relax on. Not many tourists either. Maybe its name scared them away. We sat on the sand (making sure the sea couldn't touch us this time) and I read more of The Beach to Rachelle. The small island gets thumbs up from both of us. When our time there was over, the boat took us back as the sun was setting.

We were going to go out to try some more bars, but decided the day had taken it out of us; all the swimming and feeling sick. Instead, we bought takeaway pizza and ate it whilst watching My Sister's Keeper, because Rachelle suggested the film. But even though she was the reason we watched it, she fell asleep and I watched it on my own. I woke her up to read The Beach some more. I finished it. It's the first book I've read in years. How proud I am of myself. I should read more books.

He Or She?

A good night's sleep had us feeling refreshed. An omelette was shared at breakfast. I also had a chocolate croissant, and Rachelle had a vanilla donut. It's very hot here and I don't eat much when I'm too hot, so the breakfast was very filling. Today, all we are going to do is relax. We sat ourselves on sun loungers by the pool and spent hours soaking up the rays and cooling down in the water when necessary, or just for fun. The pool bar had us drinking 'healthy smoothies' - banana for me, strawberry for Rachelle.

At lunchtime we were hungry. Luckily for us, there was no need to move, because the pool bar also serves food. It is one of those pool bars that serves you in the pool, with bar stools sunk under the water for sitting on. We ordered our food (burgers) and whilst waiting we tried to decipher if the bartender was male or female. Rachelle pointed out to me that I had referred to 'it' as 'he', whilst 'it' was right in front of us. I was worried about offending 'it'. I didn't want spit on our food. It really was very hard to tell. 'It' had a unisex hairstyle, a fairly high-pitched voice, a physique that looked more masculine than feminine, but a bit podgy, so hard to tell. The face, again, could have been of either gender. It seemed I had gotten away with referring to 'it' as a 'he'. Perhaps 'it' actually was a 'he', or maybe 'it' just didn't hear me. A few minutes later, and when the bartender was right in front of us again, Rachelle said "I don't think he heard you". Knowing she had been gender-specific, I teased and said "who?", and Rachelle replied "he, oh, I mean she...". Despite this displaying a clear lack of knowing the gender of the bartender, in front of the bartender, 'it' didn't seem to notice again. I can only guess that the language barrier saved us. We never found out if it was a he or a she.

After a day at the pool, the evening was upon us. We sat on the beach and ate ice creams, watching all the deck-chairs being packed away. The sunset was turning the sky purple and orange, which reflected off the sea. It made a beautiful place even more beautiful.

For dinner we ate Thai food, and then it was time for some drinks. Well, it was time for me to have some drinks. Rachelle still felt queasy at the thought of alcohol after my birthday night out. First we went to an Irish bar. I don't know what made it Irish though. The staff were Thai, the music was pop, and the green sign that read 'Jordan's Irish Pub' just didn't seem enough to make it so. I managed to get Rachelle to take a couple of sips from my Chang beer, but she wasn't really interested. Afterwards, we headed down to the beach where more bars were situated. They all seemed to be trying to outdo each other with fire shows, flashing lights and speaker volumes. We chose to visit two of them. The fire shows were actually pretty good. Once the flames were put out, we headed back to the room, leaving the pumping music behind.

Pee Pee

Two coaches, one mini-bus and a ferry boat later, we arrive at Koh Phi Phi at 11AM. Pulling into the small docks gave us a view that didn't make us regret our Island choice. Koh Phi Phi (pronounced 'Pee Pee') is made up of two islands that are joined in the middle - making it one island. Beautiful rock faces show themselves where trees haven't covered the hills, and perfectly clear, turquoise waters surround the island. The docks are situated on the joining section, in between the islands, and that's also where the life of Phi Phi is. Bars, restaurants, travel agencies, diving tour shops and the usual massage parlors line the narrow streets. There are no Tuk-Tuks, but we haven't avoided harassment by coming here, because there are taxi-boats to the different parts of the island and surrounding islands. Here, the taxi-boat drivers do the pestering.

We found ourselves accommodation. It's expensive, but near the beach. Once checked-in, it's first things first; nourishment. We chose a restaurant over-looking the clear water. We ate Thai food. A quick stop back at our hotel to pick up towels, and it's time to feel some white sand between our toes. It's a boiling hot day. We lie down on the sand, overlooking Ao Lo Dalam Bay. Basically, it's beautiful. We sunbathed, I read The Beach to Rachelle, and we went in the sea. The sea only ever goes up to your waist. I'm sure it gets deeper, but we didn't find where it does. The hotel has a pool, so once hours have passed on the beach we chose to swim in that instead. It's a really nice pool; fairly deep, overlooking the bay and comes complete with pool-bar. More lazy hours passed here.

We were both tired from the previous night's travel. I felt like going out to see bars, but I knew it would have been unwise. Rachelle had the idea of a movie night and getting takeaway pizza. This was a much better idea, and bars could be done tomorrow night. The hotel room does have a big flat screen on the wall after all, and we should make use of what we pay for.

The Deathly Hallows

Awake and feeling refreshed from a good night's sleep, we have one objective in mind; to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part II. It came out in Thailand on the 14th and there is a cinema in Bangkok. We haven't booked tickets and don't know how popular it is going to be, so it is a risk to go all the way to the Cineplex in case tickets are sold out, but it's a risk we are willing to take. I wanted to see it, and Rachelle hasn't stopped talking about seeing it and gets very excited in the process. We check-out, leave our bags at the guesthouse, skip breakfast and get a Tuk-Tuk.

We get dropped off, but not at the Cineplex. The Tuk-Tuk driver says something about the building opposite, but his English was poor and his directions incomprehensible. We ventured the way he pointed in hope that all would become clear. We went into a shopping mall called Siam Discovery. It was huge. The type of mall you get in America with absolutely everything in it on a grand scale. After asking a security guard "cinema?", he told us to go to Floor 4. On Floor 4 we asked a cafe employee the same question and she said it wasn't in this mall, but in the Siam Paragon and pointed us in the direction. We walked outside and there it was, another huge mall, bigger than the last, with even more inside it. We head straight up to Floor 5 where the cinema is. The queue is long and we worry about tickets selling out. Luckily there are about 9 screens showing Harry Potter. We queued for an hour. Rachelle was so excited she nearly peed herself. When we arrived at the desk there was lots of choice; films every half hour, 3D or 2D, and plenty of seats to choose from. We chose 12PM, 3D and centre-back.

With an hour to get food, it needed to be fast; fast-food that is. Seeing Burger King on the list of restaurants in the food court gave us little choice, because BK cravings kicked in. I had a Triple Outlaw (three burgers, stacked) and Rachelle had a Double Outlaw. It hit the spot. We had a quick look around the mall, got a bit lost and then headed into the cinema. Before the film started, everyone stands for the Thai national anthem, played to an inspirational set of clips involving the King.

We both loved the film. Rachelle was so happy that we got to see it, but sad that there wouldn't be any more Harry Potter films. We had a little look around some more of the mall and I bought a book before we found a Tuk-Tuk and headed back to our guesthouse. By the time we were back, there wasn't much time before our bus to Koh Phi Phi Island at 6PM. We grabbed snacks for the journey and sat under shelter whilst it rained before getting picked up by a man who took us on a long walk to the bus. They put the film 300 on the television for us. It's the first bus we've been on that has only tourists on it; not one local.

Sick

When I woke up I looked at the clock and it said 8:30AM, which was weird because our bus leaves at 8AM. I assumed that the time on the clock was wrong, but when I checked my watch it said the same time as the clock. This is not good. The tickets are non-refundable and we have a timetable to adhere to. I tell Rachelle the bad news. I suppose booking the bus for such an early start after a night of celebrating my birthday was a little bit unreasonable, but thinking about that wasn't going to help us now. I left Rachelle in the room and ran out to the travel agency to see if I could book us onto another bus for today. There was a mini-bus service leaving at 12PM with seats available. It was embarrassing when I told them why we missed our bus. At least everything was going to be okay.

We had time for showers and breakfast. Then the mini-bus picked us up at 12PM. We haven't done such a long journey in such a small vehicle before. It was much more comfortable than the other transportation we've been taking; that is, it would have been I think, if Rachelle didn't start feeling very ill after the border crossing. I imagine the way she felt had something to do with her travel sickness and a hangover from last night. She threw up into a plastic bag a few times. Rachelle prayed that she would stop being sick. Literally prayed. She doesn't usually drink enough to warrant these consequences, and she's not dealing with it well.

We get to a petrol station and hordes of mini-buses are queuing up, but not moving. The petrol station had run out of petrol. This would mean major delays in our journey, but it actually came as a blessing for Rachelle. We could get out and sit down, and after an hour of waiting before we could leave again, she had stopped being sick. She still felt terrible, but the worst was over. However, although the person to my right had stopped being sick, when we set off, the person to my left started being horrendously sick. We kept having to stop the bus for him, because it was so bad. For the entire journey I had someone vomiting next to me. 

When we got to Bangkok, it was time to search for a guesthouse. We eventually found one we could afford and once our bags were offloaded into the room it was time for much needed showers. Then we went to The Pizza Company for pizza and especially for the free cola refills. Then we went straight to bed. It was late and it had been a tiring day. Rachelle fell straight to sleep and I watched 'Carrie'. It's a sad film.

Happy Birthday, Tom!

Today is my birthday. I am 24 years old. I finally get to wear the watch that Rachelle bought me in Hoi An. It's a Breitling. Not a real one, but I've always wanted a Breitling and this is the closest I will get to having one for a while. We are awake at 4:30AM, getting ready for our trip around the Angkor sites. The Tuk-Tuk driver meets us outside at 5AM and it's dark.

On the way to Angkor Wat we buy our day tickets at $20 each. It's all very official and they put a photo of you on the ticket. We arrive at Angkor Wat, which is the 8th Wonder of the World, the largest religious structure in the world, the Cambodian's national symbol. It's still dark, but not pitch black. We walk along the bridge over the moat and up towards the main structure to watch the sunrise slowly light it up. Lots of people are up early and doing the same thing. Angkor Wat is a pretty sight; one central tower surrounded by four others, all shaped like closed lotus flowers. Once the sun is up we walk around Angkor Wat, which is now used by Buddhists (Angkorians are extinct). It has been vastly reconstructed; the 12th Century building would be largely worn away by the elements, and the damage can be seen in some areas. I think I preferred the eroded bits; it seemed more real than looking at parts I knew were reconstructed.

We spent three and a half hours at Angkor Wat, including breakfast and buying Rachelle a couple of dresses from the markets. Then, it was back to the Tuk-Tuk and on to the next stop. Angkor Thom is the old Angkorian city. It has five gates decorated in typical Angkorian style. They also have four big faces of Avalokiteshvara. They are really awesome gates. In front of the gates, as you walk up, there is a row of God statues to the left and demon statues to the right. I liked the gates a lot. 

There are many things to see in the Angkor Thom city walls. Firstly, we see the Bayon. It's a labyrinth of twists and turns. I hid from Rachelle quite a few times, leaving her to try and find me tucked away in a corner, or behind a pillar. Good fun, at least for me it was. On the top level of the Bayon are lots of towers, all with the faces of Avalokiteshvara, like the gates. The faces are everywhere; over two hundred of them apparently (we overheard from a tour guide). 

After the Bayon we saw some things, but weren't sure what they were - a tour guide would have been useful. We walked around the outside of a big structure you couldn't enter and up an alter type thing. We later saw a sign that said 'Royal Palace' and 'Phimeanakas' Temple'; I'm guessing they were those. 

It was getting to be very hot as the sun rose higher and higher. Walking around Angkor Thom (which is quite large) and up all the steps on the old ruins was becoming quite a challenge. One good thing was that we weren't mentally tired from the early start, which gives me confidence for the early mornings I will face when I start work.

After what I think was the palace and temple, we went to the Terrace of the Elephants. It was a long terrace, which, unsurprisingly, had decoration in the form of elephants. Then we went to the Terrace of the Leper King, which had walls coated in carvings. It really was time for a quick refreshment before heading to our Tuk-Tuk again, so we sat down for a cola. Then it was time to drive to Ta Prohm. I had been looking forward to Ta Prohm.

Ta Prohm is a temple that hasn't been as renovated as other Angkorian sites. It still has huge trees that have grown out of the rocks. The trees sit on the temple walls, or burst out of the floor. It's had some work done to it so that the site is safe, and so that it doesn't all fall to pieces, but it's easy to imagine being one of the first explorers to find the ruin. I love the intertwined rocks and trees: Nature mixed with ancient human construction.

We quickly visited one more temple before heading back. It was getting on in the day and the Tuk-Tuk driver had been working for us for over 9 hours. It was good timing too, because just as we set off the heavens opened and poured another monsoon of rain. After a little while, the Tuk-Tuk pulled over to one side and just waited. Then we saw a convoy of police four by fours, an important looking car and more police cars.  They whizzed past us. I thought it must be someone important, and it was the most important person in Cambodia; the King.

Once back in Siem Reap, it was still raining heavily. We ran to a Mexican restaurant for nachos and sandwiches with chips. With the rain so heavy, there was little motivation to go anywhere else and we had a couple of drinks. Once the rain finally shrinked to a drizzle, we walked around a market before heading back to the hotel. We chilled out there for a bit; watched television, had showers and got ourselves ready for a night out. It was about 9PM when we left the hotel room and decided to grab some food before drinking was to begin. We haven't been too adventurous with out food choices this holiday, and by this I mean no chicken feet or barbecued frogs. Here in Siem Reap there are lots of restaurants that do do-it-yourself barbecues. We went to one and had a mixed meat meal; chicken, beef, squid, crocodile and snake. Chicken is chicken, beef is beef, crocodile tastes like weird chicken, snake is a  bit tasteless. I didn't eat the squid. 

After dinner we went for drinks at a bar cleverly called 'Angkor What?'. It was more of a club with fluorescent wall paint, a dance floor and Westerners dancing everywhere. Not very Cambodian, but three buckets and one free T-shirt later, we were dancing on a table. Rachelle fell off the table when getting down. She was okay. Then we decided to try to make the short walk home.

We got lost. Not very lost; we simply went the wrong way down the street, but then Rachelle needed the toilet and so we went into the nearest place. It was another club, but noone was inside. I had to buy a drink as Rachelle was using the facilities and they were all expensive. I got a beer as it was cheapest. It's not like we needed another drink and we wanted to go home, so after a couple of sips, we left. We took a Tuk-Tuk to the guesthouse and Rachelle was sick as soon as we got in. It's the first time she has ever been sick from alcohol. It was a good birthday. 

Apsara Buffet

We're up early ready to leave Battambang after just one night. We don't have time to eat breakfast before the bus comes so we buy bakery foods to eat on the bus. When we get on the bus and find our seats, a woman in the two seats on the other side of the aisle asks us for one of the plastic bags that our bakery foods were in. She didn't say why, but we gave her one. She had three young girls with her, all cramped onto the two seats. As soon as the journey began, we understood why she needed the plastic bag. The girls were either extremely prone to travel sickness, or already very ill. We gave the mother all the plastic bags we had. They were filled quickly. It was gross, but I felt sorry for them. 

As soon as we stepped off the bus at Siem Reap, the usual mob of Tuk-Tuk drivers hassled us for business before we had even collected our bags from the luggage hold. We agreed to one of them. He took us around some guesthouses until we decided on one. The one we chose is very near to the City centre, close to all the bars and restaurants. The driver then wanted to be our driver for tomorrow, when we go to explore the ancient Angkor sites. He seemed like a nice, friendly, young man, so we agreed $12 to take us for the day, and we decided on a 5AM pickup. I myself cannot believe I considered 5AM, but we want to be at Angkor Wat for the sunrise.

Tonight we would like to see the traditional Apsara dancing, and there are lots of shows in Siem Reap. The Tuk-Tuk driver drove us to book tickets. The show starts at 6:30PM, leaving us some time to kill. We went for food firstly, near our guesthouse. A table across from us had travellers, also grabbing something to eat, but they kept looking over at our table. I ignored them at first, and then, one of the girls started making her way over. At first I thought she might have mistaken Rachelle and I for movie stars and was coming over for an autograph. That wasn't the case. Her table was discussing if they had seen us in Sihanoukville and she had come over to find out for sure. Along all of our travels we have run into or recognised people from previous destinations. Everyone seems to be on the same or very similar routes.

Siem Reap is a cool place. It's easy to navigate, clean, modern, plenty of bars and restaurants, and quaint little alleyways with boutique shops. I really like it. It may become my favourite city out here in Southeast Asia. After having a beer, and Rachelle a cocktail, it was time to head for the Apsara dancing. The ticket includes a buffet which starts at 6:30PM. The tables are arranged in rows in front of the stage. For an hour we had all-you-can-eat, absolutely delicious food of all types. It's some of the best food we've had and it's infinite. Rachelle, as you might expect, loved it. As it's my birthday eve we ordered wine, and that was also very yummy. At 7:30PM the show starts. An hour of Apsara dancing; about five dances, each about 10 minutes long. It was a really enjoyable evening. A great birthday eve. The dancing was odd: If I had to describe it, I'd say slow, wavy hands and flamingo impressions.

A Bed On Wheels

I wake at 6AM and my eyes struggle to focus. Rachelle is still asleep. I figure out from signs that we are in Battambang and wake her. When the bus stops and we make our way off, a happy, smiling Tuk-Tuk driver pops his head into the bus door asking "You need Tuk-Tuk?", before we've even stepped foot off the bus. I wasn't in the best of moods after lack of sleep and was rather short with him. When we had all our bags, he approached us again and we agreed to be taken to the Royal Hotel. He said he would take us on a tour to see things around Battambang later and we took on his offer. I was too tired to haggle down his price, which might mean we were ripped off, but he was very thankful for giving him a job for the day. I suppose it was only $14 for a day's work. He will pick us up at 10:30AM after we've had a much needed couple of hours in bed. 

The Royal Hotel wasn't very royal. The room had a television that didn't work, cold shower, no air-conditioning, and clearly had not been cleaned - just clean sheets on the bed. On the other hand, the price wasn't royal either, and $6 isn't bad. We meet our Tuk-Tuk driver, called Mr. Blue, and I'm in a better mood after the nap. He is going to take us to three places; the Bamboo Train, Banan Temple, and the Killing Caves. 

I suppose my expectations about the Bamboo Train were a little stupid in hindsight. I expected a train with carriages, all made from bamboo. That's not what it was. It was something like a bed-on-wheels with an engine on the back, put on rails. A man worked the engine and we sat on a mat placed on the bamboo slats of the contraption. We took it to the next station where we were shown how bricks are made. Not the most exciting destination, but I guess it was sort of interesting. A little Cambodian girl followed us around and put bracelets on Rachelle. Then we headed back on the train to where our Tuk-Tuk was waiting for us. The Bamboo Train was fun to ride.

Next we went to the Banan Temple. I prefer to call it the Banana Temple, and did so all day. It's an old, 11th Century Temple from the Angkorian period, and it's even older than Angkor Wat. It was funny to see Rachelle's reaction when she saw all the steep steps to the top of the hill where it is situated. It was a big climb on a hot day. At the top, the temple is in ruins, but it's pretty. I liked it and now I can't wait to see Angkor Wat, which I am seeing on my birthday. 

The last stop is the Killing Caves. Again, they are on the top of a hill, but we take mopeds to them and one of the drivers then takes us around explaining things. The Killng Caves are a part of the dark history that Cambodia suffered when Pol Pot and the Khmer Rouge were in power. They would throw men, women and children down the caves to their death. Now, the cave has a memorial made from some of the bones of those who suffered. Monks pray for their souls. 

We get taken further up the hill to a pagoda and a beautiful view of the surrounding area: Rice field upon rice field. We get taken back down the hill and our Tuk-Tuk takes us back to the hotel. As we drive into the city, the buildings progressed from wooden huts to concrete town buildings seamlessly. In the evening we walked around the small city, went for food, relaxed and then had ourselves an early night.

Burnt To A Crisp

When Rachelle pulls back the curtain to look outside, her report on the weather is exactly what we want. A beaming sun and a bright blue sky. Before we can go out to the beach, we have to check-out, leave our bags with the guesthouse, and eat giant omelettes from the restaurant. Then it's sea, sun and sand for the rest of the day. 

We chose beach loungers - again, they are free when you buy a drink - and set up camp. I take off my swimming shorts, revealing my small ones underneath, and placed them on the end of the lounger, and then I lounged. When I opened my eyes next, I saw a dog sniffing at the shorts placed by my feet. Then he turned around, lifted up his hind leg, and marked territory on my shorts. I was in so much shock and disbelief in what had occurred, that I didn't grab the shorts before the dog turned around, lifted his other hind leg, and did it again. I wasn't happy and didn't see the point in marking your territory on something that isn't static. I grabbed the pissy-pants and took them to the sea. 

The waves weren't as big as two days ago, but every now and then you'd get one. I went to try and body surf any big ones that came along whilst Rachelle read her book. I noticed that there were more occurrences of big waves to the left of our loungers and headed that way. When I returned to shore after about 30 minutes, Rachelle had moved along the beach to new loungers with an umbrella. She said I had left her to "burn to a crisp". She wasn't happy about being burnt to a crisp. After some shade, we moved back into the sun to work on tanning. I kept a look out for dogs. 

By the end of the day it seemed I was the one who had burnt to a crisp. My upper, exposed legs (due to my short shorts) and nose are particularly pink in colour. The second time a sun versus suncream battle has ended with victory for the sun. We went back to the guesthouse to get changed in the restaurant toilet and eat before our taxi picks us up at 7:15PM.

Despite asking for seats next to each other when we booked, seats six and seven were not next to each other. I had actually worked this out earlier in the day by mapping out a bus layout in my mind. The bus wasn't full yet, so we just sat in two that were side-by-side. It worked out. It's a ten hour journey and we are dreading it. We know it's not going to be a good night sleep.

Five hours into the journey we arrive somewhere and need to change buses. We hadn't known about this, but thought fair enough. What did raise my eyebrows was finding out from Rachelle that the city we are changing in is Phnom Penh. We have traveled all the way back east to the capital again. It's then another five hours west to Battambang. Why the Cambodia buses did this, I do not know. I probably never will. 

Rachelle felt cold due to the air-conditioning and went into her hand-luggage looking for her raincoat so that she could look ridiculous again. It was dark on the bus and she ended up cutting her finger badly whilst searching her bag. She was also desperate for the toilet, but bags and a moped blocked the way to the on-board facilities. It wasn't a good journey for her overall.

The Cinematic Experience

After our little night out, and all the free drinks, we had a lie-in. Today we are moving rooms because we wanted a cheap $8 room, but none were available until today. However, the new room isn't ready when we check-out of the old room. Outside it's awful weather - a sheet of grey covering the sky and raining. When breakfast is done with, the new room still isn't ready. We've been a bit annoyed with the service at this guesthouse for various reasons and having to wait for our room was one more annoying thing to add to the list. We wanted to get on with our day and not be waiting around with our big bags. We trotted to the guesthouse next door and haggled down the cost of a room from $10 to $8, stomped back into the other guesthouse for our bags, and stomped back out again. All of a sudden, the room was apparently ready, but we said "No, thank you", proceeding to take our business elsewhere.

We made a quick stop at an all-in-one internet cafe and travel booking agency so that Rachelle could email the bus company about her phone, and so that we could book tickets to Battambang for the following evening. It's another night bus, but this time we're on a sitting-bus, not sleeper-bus, and we ensured our seats would be together. Outside there had been no change in the weather. At a beach-side bar we had cola and hoped the sun would come out.

With no sign of the sun and our cola cans empty we went for lunch, and it was pizza. Sihanoukville is mainly all about the beach and beach bars, but the bad weather was clearly here to stay, meaning another beach bar is all we could really do. Sat under cover, overlooking the rainy beach, we drank beers and cocktails into the late afternoon.

For dinner we wanted to try our new guesthouse's restaurant, which looked very nice, and we weren't let down. It was Indian Curry Night, and it was good value. Rachelle liked the dessert most - banoffie pie for her, cheesecake for me. When our hunger was satisfied, we were left with a decision about what to do with the evening. We could go round bars again, or go to the 'Cinema'. We chose 'Cinema', and it needs to be in inverted commas because it's not the conventional cinema I'm used to. For $3 per person, you rent a private room, complete with sofa, en-suite bathroom, minibar, and a 52" HD television. Then you ask the man for a film and he brings a pirated DVD for you to put on the DVD player. We chose to watch Hangover 2 and it included people walking in front of the camera to go to the toilet or refill their popcorn buckets. I suppose, in a way, it made it more like a cinema experience.

Serendipity

We're on another bus today, leaving Phnom Penh towards Sihanoukville and its Serendipity Beach. The journey takes five hours with one stop for food where Rachelle and I shared a chicken and vegetable fried rice. The bus's air-conditioning was so cold that Rachelle spent the entire journey sat in her raincoat. We hadn't packed jumpers into our hand-luggage, so it was all she had. I refused to look as stupid and suffered the cold instead.

We arrived at the bus station. It was necessary to take mopeds to Serendipity Beach. The guesthouses and nightlife are on Serendipity Street. We choose a guesthouse and dump our bags in the room before getting sandwiches. They forgot Rachelle's order and then served her the wrong sandwich. She wasn't happy. She did have good reason to be sad, because we discovered she lost her phone, and now, of all things, she wasn't getting the food she wanted. We don't know where her phone was lost, but it's not at the guesthouse back in the capital, because we called and checked. We spent some time canceling her contract so that if someone has it, they can't use it. International calls are expensive.

Trying to forget our troubles, we head to the beach. It's lined with bars who let you use their beach loungers for free all day if you buy one drink. The sun is out and we have Angkor Beer for a measly 50 cents each. I gulped down the beer because I wanted to get into the sea. The waves were huge; some towered over my head. The water was the perfect temperature too; just right. Wave Games change when the size of them is as big as this. It's more a game of staying on your feet. The afternoon was spent lounging and playing in the waves. Whilst Rachelle was reading, young boys came up and hissed at her, which is strange. In fact, a lot of people here seem a little odd. The place is reminiscent of Vang Vieng (the tubing party town) except it's also mixed in with families on holiday.

In the evening we get some food and cocktails before hitting some bars. Having walked around a little, we have been given flyers for free drinks at three different bars. There wasn't even a requirement to buy a drink; you can just get your free one and leave. We had seven drinks between us and only paid for two. It was a cheap night out.

The Pagoda That Never Was

We got up late. It's been a while since we've had a lazy morning and it was good. Once we were finally ready, we hopped into one of the Tuk-Tuks that are always waiting outside of the guesthouse. It takes us to the National Museum of Cambodia, but we find a place to eat before going inside. The museum is full of Buddhas, Vishnus and more Vishnus. There really were a lot of Vishnu statues. Just like all the other museums we've visited in Southeast Asia, the descriptions of things aren't very thorough. If you look at a sword in a glass cabinet, it will have a description saying 'Sword', and if you're lucky, a date. Regardless, we enjoy the museum.

The Royal Palace and Silver Pagoda that we want to visit are closed for lunch, so we go to The Pizza Company - a restaurant branch I'm assuming is American. We essentially went there for the free cola refills, because it is a very hot day and I especially needed hydrating after running through a bunch of pigeons, but the pizza was good too. 

The Royal Palace and Silver Pagoda are combined as one attraction and cost around 7 pounds to see. I was particularly wanting to see the Silver Pagoda. First you see the palace; a grand building with decorated outer walls and roof. Then we go into an area with a small scale model of Angkor Wat, a statue, three grey monuments, some other buildings and it was enclosed by a painted wall. The sign had said 'Silver Pagoda' at the entrance to the area, so I was excited. However, we looked around the whole area with no sign of it. Maybe it was one of the grey monuments? I doubt it. Rachelle and I were both confused and disappointed. There was a map, but that didn't say where it was either. We never saw the Silver Pagoda.

After the Royal Palace and invisible pagoda we bought Rachelle a book and me a pen. Then we went for drinks at a bar to pass the time before the shadow puppet show. Shadow puppet shows are a Cambodian tradition and the show starts at 7:30PM. When it's 7PM, we ask a Tuk-Tuk driver to take us. At first he doesn't seem to know of it, and then, all of a sudden, he does. We get in the Tuk-Tuk. We knew where the theatre was on the map and realised from the street numbers that we weren't headed towards it. We worried he might be taking us somewhere to mug us, and when I noticed a restaurant that wasn't a restaurant (but had dressed up girls on benches who looked like they were waiting for someone) I panicked further.

It turned out that our worries were just paranoid thoughts. The theatre had moved and we had an old map. We saw the puppet show after all. It was a lot more wordy than I thought it would be and the words were Cambodian. Rachelle enjoyed it though and we were allowed to play with the puppets after the show. Then we took a moped back o the guest house before going to a Cambodian fast-food burger restaurant called BB World. Rachelle said it was the best burger she's ever had.

The Fourth Country

Our time in Vietnam is over. Today we set off for Cambodia, and more specifically, the capital, Phnom Penh. We grab bakery goods for breakfast before jumping on the 8AM bus, which takes six hours including the border crossing. The journey runs smoothly the entire way and a little Asian girl kept coming down the bus aisle to play. She was cute. She made me poke her cheek when it was full of fruit, pulled faces at me and played a hide-and-seek type game whereby she poked her head over her seat and if I looked at her she hid behind it. It was fun, and lasted until Phnom Penh. 

We jumped off the bus and made our way towards a guesthouse we chose from our Lonely Planet book. The streets are in a grid system and numbered (like in New York, though I've never been there). This makes it easy to find our guesthouse. We check-in, but leave as soon as we have dropped our bags in the room to find the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum before it shuts. It's a building once used as a school, but when Pol Pot and his Khmer Rouge came into power, it was transformed into a torture prison called S-21. There are two buildings with three floors. One building has all the torture rooms and some rooms have photographs of tortured bodies. The other building has photographs of all the people who entered the camp - the Khmer Rouge took photographs of them all as they arrived. There were faces of young and old. There were also more photographs of tortured people in the second building. In the courtyard once used for sport by school children, was old gym equipment used by the Khmer Rouge to hang people upside down as an interrogation tactic. Whilst we walked around the museum's corridors and rooms, there was a thunderstorm outside. The sound of rain and thunder seemed all too apt - a pathetic fallacy, as Rachelle put it.

From the museum we took a Tuk-Tuk to the riverside where all the bars and restaurants are. The city is much like other big Southeast Asian cities - which I suppose I was surprised about given Cambodia's reputation for being so poor. We went to a couple of bars and a restaurant. Everything here is commonly paid for with a combination of American dollar notes and Cambodian Riel.

The Search For The Armani Cafe

In yesterday's expensive taxi ride back to our road, we passed a fair few shopping malls. One of them had an Armani Cafe. Neither of us have ever seen such a thing, and decide that today we shall go to it. We also want to look around the shopping malls, because we haven't seen one on this Southeast Asia trip (other than the one in Danang, but that one hardly had anything in it and certainly no Armani shop, let alone an Armani Cafe). It's not that we want to buy anything in particular, we only want to window shop.

On setting off, we have a general idea of the direction to the Armani Cafe, but not a perfect one. It's a hot day and walking is tiring. We get about a third of the way when Rachelle breaks her flip flop. It's unfixable and she can't walk anywhere with one flip flop, so we have to pay for a moped ride back to the hotel, where she can put on her other pair.

There we are again, making our way through the heat, on foot, in search of the Armani Cafe. It took a lot of walking without any sign of the Cafe, nor the mall, but eventually we found a couple other malls to look around. The air-conditioning felt so good, but we still specifically wanted to visit the one with the Armani Cafe. On our search, we found an Indian Restaurant called Tandoor, which we had looked for yesterday, but couldn't find: Yesterday was a navigational disaster after all. It had a 'Business Lunch Special', and we made use of it, despite having no business to discuss. We were idiots and thought the soup was dip for our Chicken Aloo, and the owner had to come over to put us right. I found that embarrassing. The soup was bright orange and looked like sweet chilli sauce. How were we to know?

We wanted to visit the History Museum today, and failing to find the Armani Cafe in good time, we had to give up our search. We took a moped to the museum. The building's architecture was traditional and it was full of old things. It didn't take more than an hour to walk around and the exit was right next to the zoo. We hadn't really thought about going to the zoo, but as we were already there, and the cost was around 30p, we didn't see why not. It had giraffes, elephants, monkeys, leopards, pigmy hippo's, dear, gazelles, and various birds. All the cages and enclosures seemed too small for the animals and it made me sad. The animals needed more space. The strangest part of the zoo experience was when an Asian woman stopped taking photographs of monkeys to take one of Rachelle. She wasn't even subtle about it. She did it once at the monkey cage and when she saw us 5 minutes later, she took another of us both, face-on. I think of us, randomly in her photo-album of zoo animals. We set off to walk back to the guesthouse after the zoo.

It was on our return journey that, low and behold, the shopping mall with the Armani Cafe appeared out of nowhere. What luck! We went up the escalator to go for a drink, only, when we got to it, it wasn't a cafe at all. It was a restaurant, and a very expensive looking one at that. We decided not to go inside. Instead, we browsed the Armani shop where I managed to fake looking like I might afford to purchase something, such as the 100 pound tie, but lost all my dignity when I walked into a very clean pane of glass. It looked like you could walk straight through it. You couldn't. 

At the food court we bought some bakery snacks and ordered two Coca-Colas. When the Cokes arrived, they weren't Cokes at all, but coconuts - more language barrier problems. Neither of us like coconut milk, but we drank it anyway. When we wanted to leave the mall it was raining very heavily. Too heavily to walk in. We went to waste some time in another mall across the road. The rain didn't stop and so after browsing our fourth mall, we gave up and took a taxi. The night ended with Rachelle buying a book from a woman walking the streets with a meter and a half stack of books to choose from - something found commonly in the city streets. It was a good day.

The Unwanted Massage

In the night I discovered the cost of a wonderful evening sat by the shore and watching thunderstorms and stars; my feet are once again cursed with mosquito bites, so irritating that they wake me up. I'll not go on about them like I did the last time and leave it at that. Rachelle says it's best to try not to think about them. She doesn't like my complaining. She says I'm not the only one with mosquito bites.

It's an early start to catch the bus to Ho Chi Minh City, otherwise known as Saigon, or abbreviated to HCMC. We didn't get up in time for breakfast, so we buy cookies at the shop along the way. The journey takes about 5 hours and the bus is comfortable enough. Rachelle got a little travel sick, which was solved by swapping seats with me so that she had the window seat, but then I felt a little ill. We arrived around two in the afternoon and much to our surprise, the bus drops us off on the exact road we want to be. This is strange given that we are used to being dropped off far out of the city at times. 

We need a cheap place to stay. Beach town hotels have been a little over-budget. A man in the street says he has a guesthouse and we agree to follow him to view the rooms. He takes us down a tight alley way, making me nervous. His guesthouse is fine, adequate I suppose, but I've been made to feel uncomfortable by its alley location. We made the excuse of wanting cheaper accommodation and he insists on taking us further into the alleyway to his friend's guesthouse. It's near where the alleyway opens up again to an adjacent street. It has metal, sliding shutter doors and the family's living area is in the first room - bed, television, fridge, all there. A woman greets us with a friendly smile and shows us the room. Again, it's fine. It's nowhere near the quality we've had of late, but Rachelle reminds we've been living too luxuriously recently, and we need to go back to living in simple accommodation. This guesthouse is certainly very simple accommodation. It costs $8 per night.

The War Remnants Museum closes at 5PM and we want to fit it in today. We jump on the back of mopeds - we have become used to the idea since using them to get to Mui Ne from the train station - and get there for 3PM. It's a Museum all about the Vietnam war. The ground floor is dedicated to posters from around the world that are printed with anti-war propaganda messages saying America should stop the invasion. In addition, and the thing that intrigued me most, was a collection of medals from an American sergeant, William Brown, and a small metal plaque with the words "To the people of a united Vietnam. I was wrong. I am sorry." The next floor up was dedicated to war crimes committed by America. It showed lots of photographs, very graphic in nature, and descriptions of what the Americans and their allies did to the Vietnamese. It was saddening and even made me feel a little bit sick. I studied the photos enough to remember how horrible they were, but not long enough to commit the images to memory: They weren't ones I'd want in my head. The last floor of the Museum was a collection of photographs taken by official war photographers from around the world. Some of these were also very graphic.

After the Museum we wanted to find the Dragon Water Puppets theatre. Water Puppetry is a Vietnamese folk tradition, and so before we leave, I insist we see one. The problem is that we can't find the puppet theatre. When we finally do find it, we've arrived five minutes late. Instead, we decided to try to walk back to the main street near our hotel. Unfortunately, the photocopied Lonely Planet we have lets us down in HCMC, because the map for it is very hard to make out - a bad photocopy. We get lost and go in the complete opposite direction to our destination. We saw a lot of HCMC, unintentionally and without really wanting to. It is a large, developed metropolis. After a couple of hours we gave in and got into a taxi. The driver didn't speak good English and he said it would be 10,000 Dong to our street. This is far too small an amount for a taxi so I wanted to check, and after holding ten fingers up and him nodding, we got in anyways. Of course, we get to our road and after trying to pay the 10,000, he says no and shows us a 100,000 Dong note. To avoid another long argument with someone who can't speak English (like in Danang) we simply pay in order not to waste more time.

At dinner a small boy trying to sell bracelets approached us and after rejecting his offer, he played the practical joke on me where you point at someone's chest to make them look down and then flick their nose. I fell for it. A man started massaging me without being asked and it hurt. He also massaged my eyebrows, which, by the way, is not relaxing. He then did the same to Rachelle before demanding money. We've realised the Vietnamese are good at scamming money from tourists. I'll claim it was all part of the experience, but really I'm annoyed at falling for them.