To KFC, Or Not To KFC?

I haven't had much sleep, but in the early hours of the morning I awake from a short slumber. The lights of the bus are all on, most people are awake, and I sit up. When I try to talk, nothing comes from my vocal chords. I've completely lost my voice. I try to call for Rachelle, and only a husky, muted sound of air comes out of my mouth. That's when I wake up again: The malaria pills have been playing their usual vivid dream tricks on me. The lights of the bus are still off, a few people are beginning to wake and my voice is intact. 

I notice we are in Nha Trang from some signs. We get to our stop and get off the bus. It's 6:30AM. We have already booked our hotel and just need to find it. In the early morning, the city is already full of life and we ask for directions. It still took a long time to find the hotel because of confusion over street names. When we finally check-in and get to our room, the first thing we do is get some much needed rest. We sleep until midday.

When our eyes open there is one thing on our minds, and that thing is food. Two doors down is a KFC, which is a surprise because it's the first we've seen in Southeast Asia. We are reluctant to go there, because we didn't come here to eat the same food as back home. The awful night on the bus made us feel like we deserved it though, so we did it. Interestingly, the KFC experience was very different to KFC's at home, which made it feel like it was worth going to find out the differences. For example, the food was served out on prison-like, plastic compartment food trays. Once our stomachs had been satisfied, it was time for some sand and sun.

Nha Trang is currently in it's high season for tourism. It's the number one beach spot in Vietnam and the foreigners are scattered around. It isn't overly crowded with them though. The area of town near the coast is full of bars and restaurants with flashing lights and long happy hours to entice you inside. Our hotel is very close to the beach. We walked along it before deciding to hire a sun lounger at Louisiana Beach Restaurant and Bar. it's a place that has its own private stretch of beach, pool and restaurant-bar. Hiring a sun lounger gives you free access to the private beach and pool. The sun is out, meaning I finally even out my front tan to match my back. We order really nice cocktails during the 2-4PM happy hour and I read The Beach to Rachelle. After a few hours, we explore the waters, which are nice enough, and then we go into the pool. We then went back to the sun loungers to relax more of the day away.

In the evening we went out for Rachelle's birthday meal; belated due to the bus trip last night. She's been craving Indian curry for weeks, so we go to a recommended Indian restaurant. The food was amazing: Chicken curry, poppadoms, vegetable samosa, rice, naan bread and a glass of beer, all for the equivalent of four pounds. It sure was tasty. After that, we went for cocktails at Krazy Kim's (a place using some of its profits to raise awareness of child abuse) before going back to bed to finish recovering from the previous night's terrible sleep.

Happy Birthday, Rachelle!

As Rachelle is waking up, I sing Happy Birthday to her and give her the tailor made sandals I bought her. She put them on immediately. Our bags get packed up and we check-out of the hotel. The bus we're taking later doesn't leave until 6PM so we leave the bags by reception and hire bicycles for the day again. When we get to town we find a restaurant and order American breakfasts: Baguette, scrambled egg, lettuce and tomato, ham, bacon and pancake. It was a good birthday breakfast in our opinion. Then we spent some time looking in jewelry shops, because Rachelle would like a ring. Nothing managed to persuade her to get my wallet out, so the ring shopping will have to be adjourned to a later date. Instead, we head to a restaurant specifically for cake. Chocolate Forest Gateau and Chocolate Cream cake, shared.

Rachelle seemed to enjoy her morning of food, but it has been her specific request that her birthday involves beach. I'm not one to deny her it, so off we bike to the beach. The one problem is that we don't have any towels. We had previously used the hotel towels, but having checked-out, we have none. We sit on the sand and make-do, go in the sea and use the sea breeze to dry off. I drew a birthday cake with candles in the sand and when I asked Rachelle to blow them out, I brushed the flames away. It's the best I could do for her. She even made a wish.

After having an early dinner, we bike back to the hotel. I go in the pool for a little bit and then shower - we're allowed to use the hotel's facilities despite being checked-out. Then we wait for the bus.

The bus doesn't show up outside the hotel as we thought it would. Instead, a man comes and tells us we have to walk all the way down the road with our heavy bags. We do so. The bus journey is 12 hours long and the bus is a 'sleeper bus'. These are buses with rows of bunk beds. Rachelle and I thought we would get two next two each other, but we don't. The bus is already almost full, so we have to occupy two of the last available bunks. We are forced to spend the night apart. 

I'm at the back, on the lower bunk, which is level with the floor, and Rachelle is ahead, two rows away, on the top bunk. I can occasionally see her eyes over someone else's legs. It's a clean enough bus, but not comfortable. At one point, Rachelle was going to come and sit in the aisle next to me for a short chat, but little did she know, there was an old man sleeping in it, right next to my bunk, and therefore, she couldn't get to me. That man kept putting his knee in my bed. Neither of us got much sleep.

Wave Games

It's our plan to go back to the beach today, and knowing the distance from yesterday's walk, we decide to hire bicycles. Biking makes a great deal of sense, because we also have to go into town first for my final suit fitting and town is in the opposite direction to the beach. Without bikes it would take a lot of walking and time. We get to Yaly tailors for 10AM and the amendments make the suit look perfect. I also get to try it with the shoes and I decide the ensemble is worthy of being worn on my first day of work, two months from now. I ask for it to be sent home, pay, and then we go for a riverside breakfast.

Cycling to the beach from town was about 4km. It was much easier than walking and it didn't seem to take long. When we got there, Rachelle crashed into the back of my bike and fell off. She was okay. We locked the bikes up and found a spot on the beach. We sunbathed, I read some of The Beach aloud and we played games in the waves.

Wave Games

1) Dramatically jump over a wave, almost as if you're high jumping over it, or as if touching it at all would be lethal.

2) Pretend you're a duck swimming over the wave. You must do this before the wave starts to crash, i.e. before any white appears on the wave.

3) Sit down and let the wave hit you in the face.

4) Grab your partner's ankles and drag them into a wave so that they can't avoid going under the it. Be sure not to actually drown them.

We shared a fried vegetable rice at a nearby restaurant and spent more time on the beach after. The sun wasn't nearly as strong as yesterday so my attempts to make my front the same colour as my back failed. We made it back to the hotel for free cocktails hour.

Free cocktails hour was a waste of time. It was the same as yesterday, except the jug of banana-rum didn't have any ice in it, making it warm, which turned an average tasting drink into a disgusting one. I managed to get one down me before we left, Rachelle decided not to. We biked into town for some food and to celebrate the eve of Rachelle's birthday. At the Mermaid Restaurant we ate Vietnamese foods and then headed over the bridge to the other side of the river for a chicken sandwich, fries and tasty cocktails. What better way could there be to celebrate Rachelle's birthday eve than with two meals... Hmm, maybe three meals?

Back at the hotel we watched movies and drank a beer from the mini-bar. Rachelle fell asleep a little bit before midnight, but I woke her up again to say 'happy birthday'. I wasn't sure if I should wake her or not. I did though.

Limited Unlimited Cocktails

Before we got to Hoi An, I'd had my eye on a hotel that Lonely Planet recommended and after checking the website, it looked good value for $18: Swimming pool, air-conditioning, television, fruit basket on arrival, near the beach and unlimited cocktails in the pool area from 6:30 to 7:30PM. Today we are checking out and heading to stay at Green Fields Hotel and I am excited. Rachelle wanted to get a taxi, because it was on the other side of town and, of course, we have our heavy bags. However, my economical brain insisted we walk in the heat to save money. Rachelle isn't thrilled with the idea, but begrudgingly agrees. The walk was long, but I thought it was worth the pound or two we saved. We're on a budget after all.

The look on my face when we arrived wasn't a happy one. There was also sweat dripping off it. The front of the hotel is a construction site, not the fancy hotel I had pictured in my head. When we check-in they give us chilled chocolate-chip cookies and orange squash. Then they show us our room. There are dead mosquitos on the bed and what looks like milk on the floor. The woman who showed us to our room calls someone to clean it up and we check out the pool while we wait. Luckily I'm wearing swimming shorts so I jump in.

The back of the hotel - where our room is and where the pool is situated - is actually quite alright, and I am able to forgive the terrible first impression. Back at the room I look at the fruit basket; bruised bananas and a strange, dark purple fruit. I decide not to eat anything from it. The room is nice though, once cleaned.

It's off to the beach. At the front desk of the hotel, amidst the sound of builders outside, we ask about distance and the woman tells us it's about 2.5km, maybe a half hour walk. She recommends we hire bicycles from outside the hotel, but we decide to walk. It was a long way. A very long way, and in the heat it felt longer. The bicycle idea seemed like a good one after 45 minutes of walking. It took an hour to get there in the end. 

The beach is technically the same one as in Danang, stretching all the way down to Hoi An. It's a lot nicer here though. More palm trees, higher beach-to-sea ratio and today the sun is out. We swim in the sea and work on our tan. Unfortunately for me, reading sat up has left me with a browned back and white front. I'll have to resolve this tomorrow. After a few hours, we get a taxi back to the hotel. I have to shower before we go back to Yaly tailors to try on my suit for the first fitting.

The suit looks great and I'm happy with my design choice. Only small amendments are needed on the shirt, waistcoat and trousers. The right-hand shoe is way too tight and that needs fixing too, but I can tell it's going to be a worthy buy once finished. Tomorrow I have to come back once more after the changes. 

After the fitting, we went to the river front for dinner and shared a pizza, pasta and baguette - we were hungry. Then it was a quick walk to get back for unlimited cocktails hour by the pool of our hotel. We made it and the unlimited free cocktails offer seemed a little different to how it was advertised. There was one cocktail choice only, poured from a jug, and you're only allowed three glasses per person. The cocktail was drinkable, but not great. Never mind. I swam in the pool before we called it a night. I was very tired and nodded off quickly.

A Day On The Old Town

We hang around the hotel and eat breakfast until it's time to collect our tailor made sandals. Rachelle is happy with hers and wants to wear them, but I don't allow it, because it's not her birthday yet. I'm happy with mine too and I wear them for the rest of the day. We are doing lots of walking around Hoi An today as we explore the 'Old Town'.

Hoi An is an historical city and there are many old houses, communal houses, museums and temples. In order to see these places, you must first purchase a ticket from a ticket booth - there are lots in the city. What Rachelle and I hadn't realised was that you can only visit five places with one ticket. We only realised that after the first two places, and thought we might have wasted two entries. They seemed just as good as any other place in the end. 

We started by visiting the Japanese covered bridge - this didn't count as one of the five - and it is guarded by monkey statues on one side and dogs on the other (supposedly something to do with the Chinese year system). It also had a small worshiping area coming off the middle of it. It's a small bridge, but it looked very sturdy. The next historical place we visit is Old House of Phung Hung. Women in traditional dress explain about the house, which is 230 years old and was built with Japanese, Chinese and Vietnamese architectural design. Upstairs was a trap door, which I liked the idea of. When a large Asian family overcrowded the house, we left.

Thirdly, we visited Cam Pho Communal House, where an elderly man showed us things to take photographs of and also took a couple of me and Rachelle together. It was here that we realised the 'only visit 5 places out of 18' rule. It was written clearly on the ticket, but I hadn't bothered to read it. It's hard to blame anyone else for the mistake, but it wasn't a big mistake. We enjoyed the two places.

Next we visited the Museum of Folk Culture. For some reason they didn't take on of our remaining three credits. We guessed museums didn't count, but tried not to draw any attention to ourselves in case it did count and they had just forgotten to take one. Afterwards, we went to the Museum of Hoi An History and Culture. Again, the museum didn't cost a credit, but as we entered a part which was like a worshiping room, a credit was taken. Two credits remain.

We knew what we wanted to spend out last credit on so we saved that for last. The fourth was used on a nice looking temple called Quan Cong Temple. It was a tranquil place and loads of incense burned. Most of the incense was above our heads in the roof and the perfumed smoke floated down around us.

The last ticket was to be used on the Hoi An Handicraft Workshop. This was saved until 3:15PM, because they put on a show at that time. We went for a drink until it was time to go in. First, we looked around at people making lanterns and then the drum sounded the start of the performance. We grabbed seats in the second row (I say seats, but they were actually stools) and music was played on traditional instruments. There were three acts: A 'comical' dance about a fisherman; two women singing; another dance with Asian hand-held fans. I liked it, despite its amateur quality.

Back at the hotel I checked my emails and my mother had given the go-ahead for me to get a suit made for my birthday in light of my new job. I had done some internet research on good suit makers in Hoi An. We went to check Yaly tailors out. I looked at fabrics, options and designs. I'm indecisive and it took me a long time to choose the material and quality. I went for high-ish quality and a black with subtle stripes design - trousers, jacket and waist coat. They measure me up and the order is placed. I also order shoes to be made to match the suit and am pursuaded to have a shirt made, because it's material that doesn't need ironing and I can't iron shirts yet - the collars are hard.

We go for our dinner at a restaurant across the river. They made excellent chicken burgers and banana-coconut-rum cocktails. A cockroach jumped on my face and then ran around my body, but it didn't ruin the night. We went back to the hotel after that.

A Town of Lanterns

The hotel lady that helped us yesterday found us a taxi and told the driver to drop us off at a bus stop at a cheap rate. This is the first time we are catching a bus, as opposed to booking one in advance. When the bus arrives we have to quickly jump on and it's a short, 30 minute journey to Hoi An. From previous experience, it was no surprise that the bus didn't drop us off in the centre, or even near to it. It was also unsurprising that lots of men on 'taxi-mopeds' tried to get us to hop on with all our baggage. Not going to happen. A helpful girl, who had also taken the bus from Danang, told us we could walk into town quite easily and gave us advice on where some cheap hotels hide. We made our way.

The short walk was tiring with our heavy bags, but it was nothing compared to arriving in Danang a couple of days ago. We ask some hotels about prices before settling on one. It has an indoor pool, along with the usual television and air-conditioning amenities we've been enjoying since travelling Vietnam. We seem to be staying at better and better hotels as we go along on this trip.

Hoi An is well known for shopping. We don't feel orientated enough to do all the historical and cultural things yet, and we have time here so walking around and looking at shops and the town seemed like a good idea, and it was. It's not the biggest city we've been to by any means, but there's something really nice about it. The streets aren't crowded, it sits on a quaint river, there are pretty buildings (architecture is a mix of Chinese, Japanese and Vietnamese) lots of restaurants and small shops. The most prominent business here seems to be tailor made clothing and shoes. Such shops are everywhere you look. Other shops include gift, art and craft types.  Rachelle and I buy a few bits and bobs. 

Both our birthdays are coming up, and even though we exchanged gifts before we left for Southeast Asia, we said we would get each other something small for the actual days from out here. As Rachelle has had her mind set on getting tailor made sandals, it seems a fitting present. We choose a shop that we think looks good (there's so much choice that it's hard to know where to go). She chooses a design, the quality and the colour. When the shop worker tells me she will give a discount if we buy two pairs, I can't resist customising my own sandals. Our feet are measured and the shoes will be ready tomorrow, 11AM. 

At night, Hoi An is even more beautiful. Lanterns illuminate the streets and it becomes a busier place. In the river are large animal shaped lanterns. It certainly has its own atmosphere. Rachelle and I both really like it. She especially likes the food. We end the night by going to two bars - one had a good happy hour for drinks and the other played pop-punk songs.

Bring Me The Horizon

Given that yesterday was a bit of a non-day, it was important to get everything done today. A taxi is parked outside our hotel and we enquire about prices to the Museum of Cham. The driver starts talking about taking us to the Marble Mountains after the museum, which is fine with us, because that's another place we want to visit here. We also tell him that we want to go to the beach, and a price is negotiated. After our bad luck from yesterday, we can't believe things could be this easy.

The Museum of Cham contains artefacts from Cham sites; sandstone carvings. There aren't many people in the museum so Rachelle takes a photo of me behind a headless statue to make it look like the body is mine. Security guards didn't notice me getting up on the display. Some of the statues and decoration were really good, and unlike British museums, photographs were allowed. We leisurely browsed the gift shop with no intention to buy anything, but then, almost out of nowhere, we see a Lonely Planet guide - the same one I lost yesterday. When we open it up we immediately realise it's an illegal copy: In Vietnam they photocopy Lonely Planet guides and sell them on cheap because they know it encourages tourism. We snatch it up and pay the 200,000 Dong, which feels like a bargain knowing how valuable the guide is to us. The pictures are in black and white, the maps not as clear as in the original, but it's good enough. We hop in the taxi and head for the Marble Mountains.

The Marble Mountains are south of Danang and used to be Islands a very long time ago. There are five, each said to represent the five elements (water, metal, wood, fire and earth) and they tower over the surrounding buildings and countryside. We visit the Water Mountain. In the heat it's a long climb up all the steps and the bottle of water we bought at the bottom seems to empty quickly. Halfway up is a Pagoda and a little further on is a beach viewing spot. I couldn't really see the beach from it though, just the sea. On the top of the Marble Mountain you can walk around and there are three caverns to explore, each with Buddhist shrines. From the top you can also see the other Marble Mountains.

All the way down the other side is another Pagoda with elaborate statues around it. I thought we could get from the other side back to our taxi, but that wasn't true, and Rachelle playfully resented me for all the steps back up again. It was a tiring sight to see, quite beautiful and enjoyable to explore.

Back at the bottom we look around a shop of marble ornaments before the taxi takes us to the beach, but when we get there, there's a problem: The taxi driver said we could only spend 30 minutes there and we wanted much longer. We discuss paying him and having him leave us here to find a taxi back when we please. Of course, this means we needed to discount the agreed price of the taxi, and given that it apparently costs 70,000 Dong from the beach back to Danang, we thought 380,000 (down from 450,000) was fair. The following conversation occurred:

Tom: How much from here to Danang?

Taxi: 70,000 Dong.

Tom: Okay, so 380,000 Dong is fair, yes?

Taxi: No, 400,000.

Tom: 450,000 minus the fare from here back to Danang is 380,000. That's fair.

Taxi: No, 400,000.

Tom: No, if we pay you 380,000, that makes sense because we agreed a 450,000 day trip.

Taxi: Okay, I will do 370,000.

Tom: ...Okay.

... and I thought I was bad at haggling.

We stay at the beach for hours. At first it was deserted. The whole place to ourselves. The sand was warm and the sea was the perfect temperature to swim in. The sun hid behind thin clouds most of the time, but it was so warm anyway that it didn't matter. More incredibly, I could see the horizon. After the mountainous landscapes of the past weeks, the horizon has been a distant memory. Out across the sea, I can finally see it again. Beach is a nice change from rain forest.

After we get something to eat, the beach becomes a bit more crowded. Despite the clouds, Rachelle gets sunburnt and we decide to head back. We find a metered taxi and get in. We had shown the driver the name of our hotel and yet, when we got to Danang city, he didn't have a clue where to go. Rachelle and I kept trying to tell him the directions, but he was useless. He kept stopping to ask other taxi drivers and kept going round in cirlces, despite the meter continuing to go up. Eventually, we find the hotel, but the cost has gone to 98,000 Dong and he insists we pay it. I refuse because it's his fault it took so long and we start arguing. He can hardly speak English and I can't speak any Vietnamese, so it took a while. Eventually, the hotel owner came out and we all started trying to solve the problem. The hotel lady and the driver did most of the talking. Rachelle and I had no idea what they were saying, but after a while we paid 70,000 Dong. I'm glad I stood my ground for the equivalent of one pound.

In the evening we went to Bread of Life cafe, where we had eaten on our day of arrival in Danang. Many of the staff are deaf, it's nice food and a proportion of the profits go to deaf people; it's like food with a side of morals.

The Lost Lonely Planet

Bags packed and ready for the bus to Danang, which is south of Hue. We order breakfast in plenty of time to be ready for an 8AM pickup, however, the bus arrives twenty minutes early and the driver seems eager for us to get on and go. We're rushing around, trying to pay for the hotel and getting our breakfast changed to a takeaway. We throw on our bags and get seats. We're first on the bus.

We need to research Danang in our Lonely Planet guidebook before we get there. That's when I realise that in the rush of getting onto the bus, I left it on the reception desk. This is not good at all. Our Lonely Planet is our only way of knowing anything about anything here, and we now have no idea what to do or where to go in Danang. It's our lifeline and it's gone because of me. Having always moaned at Rachelle for nearly losing things all the time, I fear I have become a hypocrite. Damn.

Thankfully, when we arrived in Danang (after almost missing our stop) a lady asks if she can help, and she points us in the direction of guesthouses and hotels. We have no idea if we're in the right area at all, because Danang is large; the fourth largest city in Vietnam. Without our Lonely Planet, we have little choice but to find a place to stay on our own. After lots of walking, we find a hotel and haggle down the price to 275,000 Dong per night.

We both want to go to a Museum we read about in our Lonely Planet guide before I lost it, but we can't remember what it is called. Walking around the streets in Danang is uncomfortable because everyone stares at us like we are aliens. They aren't subtle about it. People don't speak English very well here either, but we ask someone where a Museum is in hope it's the right one. It's not the right one. As the 'Museum of Danag' is free entry, we quickly look around part of it before deciding we really need to find a copy of the Lonely Planet in a bookstore. Doing this blind, so to speak, isn't working.

We walk far and for hours around Danang city and only find two book shops. One has no English books what-so-ever and the other only has the Cambodia Lonely Planet. Not helpful. We don't see any other tourists and the staring continues. After a while it's time to give up and Rachelle suggests spending some money in an internet cafe to research things, and that's what we do.

It's too late to do anything like Museums at this point, but we are ready to go to the Museum of Cham tomorrow, now that we know it's name. We spend the rest of the night walking down Danang's streets to where we think some places to go are. The Lonely Planet website suggested Christie's Cool Spot bar and restaurant, but when we got there it was overpriced. The site also suggested the Han Markets, but the stalls were closing when we found it. It also suggested the cathedral, which we saw the outside of, but that didn't take up much time. The day seemed against us so we walked down the river, stopping for a drink and again for food, before returning to our hotel room. So far, Danang not so good. I blame Rachelle for wanting to come here.

Ladyboy Emperor

We aren't staying long in Hue, which means that we have to see all the sites today. In order to do this efficiently and hassle-free, we booked ourselves on a city tour. It starts at 8AM, just after breakfast. We're last on the bus, which is nicely air-conditioned and there is a tour guide whose english we can understand most of. The morning of our tour involves visiting three tombs of Vietnamese emperors. Our guide gave us a handy way of differentiating them: One emperor had smallpox, so couldn't bear any children; one emperor was very popular, so had 500 wives; one emperor liked the colour pink, so he was a ladyboy.

Two of the tombs are in grounds with lots of water and trees and statues. They are really beautiful places and you can see why the emperors would want to live in and roam around them. The areas are quite large and despite still being fairly early in the day, we are recognising the difference in temperature between Lao and Vietnam. It's much hotter here. The last tomb we visit (popular emperor) is in a large building, but you have to go up lots and lots of steps to get to it. In the blistering heat, it wasn't easy. Luckily, lunch came after this tomb to replenish our energy levels. We sit opposite two young Vietnamese girls who are learning English at school. One of them is confident enough to try out her what she's learnt.

After the buffet, the tour continues. We go to the Citadel, which is an old city built by the first emperor of the last dynasty. It's an important place despite being almost completely destroyed by the war. Some buildings from the old city still stand and we walk around the place, exhausting ourselves in the heat. We see lots of other Westerners who seem to be suffering worse than we are, sweating and having to sit down for a break. We have had to go around the tombs and Citadel at a fast pace, because with so many stops on the city tour, we can't spend too long at each. You could easily spend half a day at any of them. The tour gives you enough time to see everything, but not quite enough time to really admire it fully. That's travelling.

Next on the tour is a Mandarin house and garden. It's where some Mandarins used to live I think. Maybe they advised the King. I'm not sure. I couldn't understand what our guide said at this point. The garden wasn't very good though. Everything was brown and dead.

The last site is a Pagoda. A Pagoda is a temple for monks in Vietnam. The Pagoda has levels, in each of which there is a Buddha statue, and the monks have to worship every one of them every day. It's a tall, thin building and has decoration on it. I liked the Pagoda. After we're done, everyone from the tour gets on a Dragon Boat and we go down the Perfume River (so named because of the nice-smelling grass that once grew there) back to the city. It was a fast-paced, but interesting, tour.

In the evening we go to a rated restaurant and order loads of food, then go back to the room to make use of the television.

Journey From Hell

Picked up from our hotel at 7AM in another motorbike-sidecar-Tuk-Tuk, we go to the bus station. We sit and watch lots of nice-looking double-decker buses around. We wonder which one is ours, when an old, turquoise coach pulls up. We get on and sit at the very back. The bus isn't the cleanest, it's very smelly, and it looks like it is a bus for locals. No tourists are on it at all except for us. Despite this, I remain optimistic...Rachelle, less so. I'm sure the next 12 hours to Hue in Vietnam will fly by.

The locals keep staring at us. You'd think that after the eleventh or twelfth stare they would have seen enough of our white faces, but no. Some spit intermittently out of the windows along the way. There's also a bag with something square in it next to us that keeps chirping; it's a bird in a bird cage. At one point a stupid woman sat on it thinking it was just a box, and the cage was squashed. I imagine the bird was pretty upset about the bus journey and I felt sorry for it. 

Our journey wasn't going great either. The back seat was full and a Laoatian lady in a thick cardigan kept leaning heavily on Rachelle. I was squashed up against the window and the bumpy roads kept smashing my elbow into it. At one point, we stop for a 'toilet break' in the middle of nowhere. All the men get out and start peeing in full view beside the bus. When in Asia, do as the asians do - I join them. The women do their thing on the other side of the bus. Rachelle doesn't join them.

As the bus gets fuller, people start having to sit on the floor at our feet and lie on our bags. They are all staring and laughing. We hear them say "Phalong" a lot, which we know means 'foreigner'. None of them speak English, but they still try to talk to us. We shrug our shoulders. One gross looking guy who kept smoking out the back window and who particularly didn't seem to be able to keep his eyes off us, managed to say "very beautiful" to Rachelle. Giving the 12 hour nature of the trip, and all the accumulated annoyances, I'll admit it made me bitter; the straw that broke the camel's back.

Rachelle hates the journey as much as I do. It was quite horrendous to be honest, but we arrive in Hue...Kinda. We actually arrive near to Hue. They throw us off 4km away for some reason and we have no idea where to go. We pick up our heavy bags and within seconds there are men on mopeds telling us they will take us into town for $5. Not only is that a ridiculous price for a 4km journey, but I don't know how they expected to take us when we both have our huge travel bags and backpacks. Despite rejecting them, they don't leave us alone and we have to run away.

Making our way on foot to Hue worried us, but after a while a taxi finally pulled up and we negotiated $2 to the road we pointed out from a map in our Lonely Planet. We chose a guesthouse called 'Halo' from the book, but the taxi driver didn't seem to know it, so he just dropped us off on the road. We can't seem to find Halo when a woman from a place called 'Google Hotel' sees us with our bags and makes her sales pitch. She claims that her hotel is Halo guesthouse, but that she changed the name. We are both sceptical of this, but desperate, so we agree to view the room. In the end, the place looks amazing and does actually fit the description of Halo in the Lonely Planet. Maybe she was telling the truth. Lovely clean rooms with television, air-conditioning, mini-bar, breakfast included and free internet: All for 380,000 Dong. Things were starting to look up.

We explore an area of restaurants and bars. Hue is a nice city and far more developed than anything in Lao. Furthermore, the food is cheap. I order a burger with egg, bacon, cheese and salad, and Rachelle gets a burger too. After a cocktail each, we are shattered, and go back to our lovely room.

Mr. Coffee

It's another early start today and we begin by having breakfast by the waterfall in the restaurant. The fruit salad we ordered was one small banana and five pieces of pineapple. Hardly a salad. My mosquito bites were still an annoyance and had woken me up last night again. I keep applying the antiseptic cream in hope it will do something for them. I'm complaining about them a lot to Rachelle. I counted over fifty bites on my hands and arms alone. I didn't even bother counting the ones on my feet, because there are so many. After breakfast, we get on the bus.

We're on our way to Pakse, but before that we are going to a coffee-maker to learn about coffee. It's run by a Dutch guy who married a Laoatian woman and they have a son together. Mr. Coffee is very passionate about coffee and is incredibly friendly. I like him. Unfortunately, I don't like coffee and when he serves out his coffee, I sit there with nothing to drink. One of the girls slips as she walks over from the bus and lightly grazes her arm, which causes her to faint, because apparently she can't handle blood. There wasn't any blood; it was a graze. Her sister puts a transparent plaster on it (I'm sure you're thinking the same thing I am about that) and when she comes around again, she acts like her arm is broken. It was a small graze.

We learn how the coffee is made by doing it. We smash the coffee beans out of their shell, Mr. Coffee's wife separates the broken shells from the beans, then Mr. Coffee roasts the beans and cools them down. They are then grinded into coffee powder and he adds the hot water to make it drinkable. We all taste the coffee. I do too, because I feel I should, but I don't enjoy it. Afterwards, he tells us about coffee plants. I now know what one looks like.

We're not allowed into the coffee plantations, because they were trimming the plants and snakes love the trimmings, making it too dangerous. Instead, he treats us to his finest and most expensive coffee, the beans of which are digested and excreted by Civet cats before they are collected to make coffee. I drink half an expresso cup and Rachelle has the other half. It was okay I guess. I wouldn't really know if it was good or not.

It's a couple more hours on the bus and we arrive in Pakse. Rachelle and I go for food before embarking on a very important decision regarding our trip. It's time to decide when and how we leave Lao. It's a long and stressful story involving internet research, travel ticket offices and a pointless trip to the bus station in a moterbike-sidecar-Tuk-Tuk in which we got wet from the rain. To cut a long story short, we leave for Vietnam tomorrow. 

We meet the Stray travellers for pizza and drinks to say goodbye. We hadn't planned to leave the group so suddenly, but as Jan said, "That's travelling". It's strange to think we won't be getting on the bright orange bus again and I feel bad for leaving all my tissues I used to blow my nose in the net pocket of my seat.

Uh-oh, Bungalows Again

The itching bites had aggravated me enough to wake up in the middle of the night, and in doing so, it indirectly woke Rachelle up too. In the morning we get back to the bus for a 7:30AM departure. The reason we must leave so early is because the journey today is a long one; 8 hours long, with stops for food and an animal trading market. The tiredness and mosquito bites weren't the only things that would make the journey uncomfortable. Anyone who knows my immune system will think it no surprise that I managed to catch a cold. I've lasted the whole trip so far without food poisoning or stomach problems, but of course, I manage to catch a cold in a tropical climate.

The stop at the animal trading market was sad, because all the animals are in bags, small cages, overcrowded buckets or tied to tables. Apparently, most animal trading is illegal, but it happens anyway. Otherwise, the journey is long and boring, but we eventually get to Tad Lo. The guesthouse is right next to the waterfall, which can be clearly seen from the restaurant. When we discover that our accommodation is a bungalow, I get flashbacks from the awful night we had at the Sunset Bungalow in Nong Khiaw. I open the door to our bungalow with worried eyes and turn on the light. Thankfully, and to my relief, they are actually quite nice for bungalows. No bugs and a western toilet. I remember shouting 'Hallelujua!' after seeing the toilet. I didn't want another bucket toilet to deal with like in the last bungalows.

After looking at the waterfall, Rachelle and I go to see if there's anywhere to swim. When we get a closer look at the water it really doesn't look very clean and I spot bits of rubbish floating around. It looked nicer from far away. It took little consideration before deciding not to swim. We were both a bit disappointed, because Tad Lo is quite rural and there is nothing to do here except look at the waterfall, which gets boring after a while. The uncomfortable, eight hour journey just didn't seem worth it in the end.

Eating is all we really had left to do, but the restaurant where we were staying was too expensive so we went to a nice cheap place called 'Tim's'. We ate a lot. Then, with little else to do, the early morning start and my feeling ill, it made sense to go to bed early. I laid in bed sniffling and itching.

Is That A Television?!

I wake up feeling the night before and the bites from camping are irritating my hands and feet so much that I can't help but scratch them. The bus doesn't leave until 11AM today, meaning we have time to go for a swim. In front of the entrance to Kong Lor cave is a small lagoon that you can swim in. Rachelle, me and two others go to the lagoon. The cooling water refreshes me and helps to make me feel better. All of us spent too long swimming and by the time we'd made our way back and loaded our bags on the bus we had made everyone forty minutes late for setting off. We apologise.

It's a short few hours journey today to get to Thakhek. When we arrive, Rachelle and I decided the hotel accommodation the others are staying at is too expensive, but V-Man tells us about another hotel a short walk away. It's called The Mekong Hotel and is run by Vietnamese people. We check in at the agreed price of 80,000 Kip. When we see the rooms we are thrilled with our decision to come here. The room is clean, big and has a television. The television even has a movie channel showing films in English. After all the very basic rooms we've been staying in, Rachelle and I can't stop smiling. Sure, the bath is a little grimy, but we have a television! We get ourselves washed and get ready to the film 'Julie & Julia'.

The hotel sits right on the Mekong river and on the other side we see Thailand again. We walk down the Mekong and find a place to sit where we order some drinks and watch the sun set into Thailand. After that, we meet the others for food.

It's an early start tomorrow so it makes sense to go to the hotel room fairly early. At night our hotel is called the 'Meko Hotel', because the 'n' and 'g' letters don't light up. My bites from camping are sending me crazy, but Rachelle lost the afterbite so I am forced to suffer. We try to substitute the afterbite with antiseptic cream, but it didn't really do the trick. Zombieland comes on the movie channel so that gets watched and then it's time for sleeping.

Lao Lao

I learnt a lesson as I awoke from my sleep on the museum floor in Tad Leuk: If you put mosquito repellent on and then go swimming (like I did yesterday) you need to re-apply the mosquito repellent in order to continue repelling mosquitos and this is because it will wash off. It's possible that this is common sense, and to be honest, I knew this beforehand, but nothing drills it into your head more than waking up to find your hands and feet covered in bites. The itching was unbearable. 

The bus takes us to a small place to grab some food and later takes us to a viewing point. The view is of something called the 'limestone forest'; jagged limestone rocks covering the hills. It's a nice view and it's very hot. My itching bites still aggravate me as we continue towards our next stop, Kong Lor.

Kong Lor isn't a very big place. In fact, it's rather a small place with one road surrounded by rice fields and the mountains. The houses are all made from wood, except for a couple of guesthouses, one of which we stay in. Ours has a restaurant and basic rooms. Rachelle accidentally kills a cockroach when she puts her bag down on the floor of the room. They can survive nuclear explosions, but they cannot survive Rachelle. After quick showers, we head downstairs to meet the rest of the group. We are going to Kong Lor cave together.

Kong Lor cave is the only reason to visit this small town. Rachelle and I are somewhat bored of caves, but this one is worth seeing. It's a huge cave that goes from one side of the mountain to the other. Water runs through it and you travel on a five-person boat with an engine stuck on the back. To give an idea of the size it takes approximately 45 minutes to an hour to get from one side to the other, and at its largest point the cave is 100 metres by 100 metres. The cave is not lit up all the way through, but you can make out most of it from the headtorch of the driver. It's quite incredible and the cool temperature is certainly welcomed by us. Half way through we get out of the boats and walk around a part of the cave with some great stalactites and 'mites. These are all lit up and look pretty. Then it's back in the boats. 

Of course, I have a beer with me for the ride through the cave, and at the other side is a small kiosk for me to buy another. Then we head back through to Kong Lor again.

When we get back to the guesthouse it's time for dinner before going to a Laoatian good luck ceremony in a nearby village. It takes place in the chief's house and we all sit on the floor around a centrepiece; leaves and white pieces of string in a vase. An elderly man starts saying things in Laoatian in a chanting manner for a while. As he does this a glass of Lao Lao is passed around from which we must all sip - Lao Lao is a Laoasian spirit and is very strong stuff. We later find out that the man was wishing us good luck. Then he takes the white string pieces from the centrepiece and gives them to some women from the village who come around and tie them as bracelets to our arms. The bracelets must remain on your arm for three days for the good luck to work. As the first woman places the first bracelet on your arm you have to drink a shot of Lao Lao. They poured me a very big one. 

For the rest of the night there are snacks, music is played and there is lots of Beerlao to be drunk. It lasts for hours and the Lao Lao hits me hard. I embarrass myself; started trying to meditate for crying out loud. Damn that Lao Lao.

Camping

I was excited for the included breakfast at the guest house. I shouldn't have been. A very small egg and two pieces of toast wasn't quite the belly-filler I expected. The local option was curry and rice, which I still can't quite stomach in the early mornings. Once we'd finished, we decided to go to the Mekong and I'd read more of The Beach to Rachelle. The area was deserted, in contrast to last night, except for some rubbish pickers. After that we had to get back on the bus. Before our journey, the bus quickly stopped at a Western supermarket where things were imported from all sorts of countries (Western countries) but that also made it expensive. Rachelle and I bought crisps, bananas, a pastry and marshmallows. The marshmallows are for tonight; we are going camping.

The campsite is in a national park and is called Tad Leuk. 'Tad' in Laoation means waterfall, so as you might guess, there's a big waterfall. We spend some time exploring the campsite and looked around a 'museum', which is actually just a big room with some information about the wildlife in the national park. Apparently there are butterflies, elephants, King Cobras,  crocodiles and so on. Then Rachelle and I decided we wanted to go on a trek. We enter the forest and after some small black ants began biting us, we ran out again, ridding our legs of the little beasts. We had only managed to walk 5 metres before abandoning the trek idea. It looked like all we would have seen was foliage anyway. 

Instead of trekking, we decided to find a place to swim. We were right next to the waterfall (and thus, the river) but the strong, rapid flow of the water meant it wasn't even nearly safe. We headed upstream, crossed a bridge and found calm waters. But it was too calm, and I became afraid leeches may be lurking beneath the murky water, so we headed back. As we retreated (again), we ran into the others on the bridge, and with our advice, we all looked for somewhere else to swim.

It wasn't too hard to find a decent, safe place to swim in the more rapid waters. A few large rocks near the edge slowed the rapids down in the area directly in front of them enough for us to paddle in. I went as near to where the faster water was without getting swept away, but needed to grab hold of Rachelle a few times. We enjoyed the waters for a fair while.

Back at the camp we dried off, got changed and sat talking whilst we waited for dinner to be cooked. When ready, it was sticky rice, beef, chilli sauce and Beerlao. The night was spent eating, drinking and chatting until late. A cat took a liking to Rachelle and sat on her lap, a bat flew around our heads, a dog licked my toes and ghost stories were told. Once it was late, we had to retire to the museum, because they hadn't set up tents for us due to potential rain. We were given small, dirty mattresses and no pillows, divided the room into sleeping and changing areas, and tried to get some rest with an old sleeping bag covering us. The stupid thing about the sleeping arrangement tonight is that it's the most expensive we've had in all of Lao, and even Thailand. Quite ridiculous. It didn't even rain, so we could have tented. Despite all this, I actually get a good night sleep.

Moon City

It's back on the bus as we travel to Vientiane, the capital. Directly translated, 'Vientiane' means 'Moon City'. Our guide from now on is a New Zealander called 'V-Man'. Before being taken to our accommodation, we do a city tour. We visit two places: The first is a golden monument, which is very important to Lao. I didn't catch quite why it was important, but it features on the 50,000 Kip note, so it must be. The second stop is a big concrete arch made from leftover airport runway concrete donated by the Americans. It's thus given the nickname, 'The Vertical Runway', and is similar to the Arc de Triomphe.

Rachelle and I are on a budget, so refuse the suggested accommodation and search for our own. Wandering the Vientiane streets with our heavy bags, we come across a hotel and enter the reception to ask for prices. Deciding that $115 is too much for one night, we scurry out and head back up the road. We run into V-Man, who points us in the direction of affordable guest houses. We find one that includes breakfast for 10 pounds a night. The room is small and basic, but nice.

Next on the to-do list was buying supplies (replenishing our toilet roll stash) which was a joy because they have air-conditioned convenience stores here - something we haven't seen in Lao so far. Then we ate at a nice little restaurant before heading down to the Mekong river to watch the sunset and talk. Across the river is Thailand, which we miss for its curries. The area is filled with Laoations cycling, jogging, chatting and the children play in the play-park. It's a popular recreation ground for locals. 

When it gets dark we walk through a park, which is barely lit and has a homeless man looking through bins. I also got hit on the head by a shuttlecock, but I blame myself for leading us into the middle of two girls playing badminton. 

In the night we explore Vientiane. It's very much a city, which is strange because even the city of Luang Prabang didn't really have a city vibe. We laugh when we see a Laoation fast-food restaurant called 'McconKey', find an actual supermarket (first one in Thailand and Lao we've seen) and end up going to McconKey's on the way back to the guest house. We didn't feel guilt over eating at the chicken fast-food restaurant, because it's an authentic Laoation chain and we're here to experience all of Lao. That's how we justified it anyway. It was good.

Last Day in Vang Vieng

We chose Family Guy for our breakfast entertainment and watched that until lunch when we moved to another restaurant to watch Friends. It's our last day in Vang Vieng, but Rachelle isn't sad to be leaving tomorrow. I enjoy the televisions in the restaurants, as our rooms of the past two weeks have been devoid of them, but I am pleased to be leaving too I suppose. Unless you want to get drunk tubing every day, there's not much to do. Furthermore, the locals don't smile here. Sometimes they don't even try to talk. I think they're upset because it's as if tourists have plagued their town. Their anguish is understandable.

As it's our last day we go tubing again, but the excitement we had the first time is gone because we are familiar with it and a lot of the fun was the mystery behind the activity - not knowing what to expect from each bar and all that. I did get offered a Happy Menu for the first time, which is basically a drugs menu. Of course, I didn't use it. I also had a shot from a bottle of whiskey that had some strange animal bone - potentially a spine - which made me throw up in the river. Not my proudest moment, but I cracked open a can of Beerlao to wash the taste away. I'll avoid drinks with animal parts in them from now on.

The evening was spent in a deserted bar that sold buckets of Lao whiskey and coke for one pound and gave free shots. We also ate baguettes later on.

Rocks Are Hard

Another early start because Jan and I are going rock climbing. Rachelle wanted to do it too, but a worry about money supply, her scrapes from tubing and still feeling a bit unwell stopped her booking it with us last night. She does, however, come to watch me. It's a Tuk-Tuk ride and when it stops we get out (obviously). The rock face is still quite far away and we have to walk over a very muddy path, cobbled stones and up slippery, sharp rocks. Rachelle struggles in flip-flops, often losing one or the other. At the top, we're all sweating.

After the guides set up the ropes, I volunteer to go first. I've explained previously that I like climbing, but I've never done rock climbing before - bouldering I've done at University with Rachelle, but not rock climbing. Finding your footing is a lot harder on real rocks, and so is finding places to grab hold of. I manage to get to the top, but I must admit I found it harder than I imagined. My back dripped with sweat, which Rachelle felt the need to comment on when I got back down. Jan completes the route faster than I do. 

Rachelle was offered a turn, even though she didn't pay - lucky. She actually did very well, getting quite high but fell just short of the top. She seemed happy to get a turn, which made me happy. 

The second route was more difficult than the first. The holes and footing were much harder to find and with my exhaustion from the first rock face, I had to give up near the end. I was very disappointed. To make things worse, Jan completes it, but then again, he looks like he could be in the German marines. I have another go at the route, but with accumulated muscle pain, I don't even get passed half way this time. It was all still fun though.

On the way back from climbing, Rachelle slips on a rock landing on her bum and breaks a flip-flop. The getting there and back was more dangerous than the actual activity.

In the afternoon the three of us go to the Blue Lagoon. The Blue Lagoon is supposedly the attraction you should do if you are not tubing. After seeing it, I disagree. You have to pay to get there by Tuk-Tuk, there's an entry fee, and it's not even a lagoon... it's not even blue! It's green. It's just a small river with some rope swings in it, which would be somewhat okay, except it starts to rain when you get there and you just end up going home after a beer. That's what our experience of it was anyways.

In the evening I read more of The Beach to Rachelle and we ate at a restaurant whilst watching Friends.

Friends or Family Guy

Hungover. Deservedly. I wake up early, because Charlotte is going to get the bus today and we said we'd say goodbye with breakfast. Rachelle tells me she couldn't sleep in the middle of the night and sat outside reading. She doesn't feel very well - half alcohol and half exhaustion is my guess. We go for breakfast.

After eating and our goodbyes, we got back to the room. I'm tired, but don't feel like I can fall asleep again. Instead, I read The Beach aloud to Rachelle, sending her to sleep.

Aside from the tubing, Vang Vieng is a strange place. It's full of restaurant-bars with bed-sofa type seating and they all have televisions playing either Friends or Family Guy DVDs. I saw one playing The Simpsons and one playing South Park, but on the whole, Friends and Family Guy are most popular. All the tourists emerge late morning for food and then at about 1PM the place greatly thins out because tubing starts again. Today Rachelle and I went from restaurant to restaurant, re-hydrating, relaxing and watching Friends. When it gets dark, the drunks re-enter, soaking wet.

Tubing

We leave early today, 7AM, but wanted to get up even earlier to see the monks receive their alms at 5:30AM. Waking up is hard to do and we sleep in until 6:30AM. It was too ambitious I suppose. Today's bus ride was horrible. We're used to between five and seven people charing the Stray bus, leaving ample space, but today the bus has thirteen travelers and three Stray employees. The only good thing about the six hour journey is when we stop off at the top of a mountain where the view is nice. We eventually arrive in Vang Vieng.

A lot of people are leaving on the bus again tomorrow, so everyone is doing tubing today. Tubing has made Vang Vieng famous: You hire a rubber tube, go to the river and drift down the beautiful scenery surrounding you. Along the way are bars - everyone gets drunk. The trick is to be careful or you might die, and people do. In fact, two weeks ago they took all the swing ropes down following two deaths. In the Tuk-Tuk to the starting point we drink cans of Beerlao that Jan bought for us. We're in a big group (Stray travelers) but Rachelle, Charlotte, Jan and me feel like a sub-group, because we don't know the others very well. 

Before we even get into the river, there is a bar - the starting point. As we arrive, we get coloured string bracelets and whiskey poured into our mouths from the bottle. The place blasts music, everyone is drinking and it reminds me of a mix between what I imagine Magaluf and an American frat party would be like. Limbo, beer pong, beer bong and buckets of alcohol. We order a vodka coke bucket between three of us whilst Jan sticks to beer. We chat whilst watching what seems to be mainly Brits acting drunk.

Grabbing our tubes, we jump into the river, which has a surprisingly strong current, and we float to the next bar. They throw rope to you as you float by and you pull yourself to the side. More music blasts and we get a whiskey bucket, shared again. At the bar, people are trying to climb a tall bamboo pole in the middle of it. With many attempts, most fail. I've loved climbing from a young age. I remember climbing the trees in the back garden of my house in Germany when I was 8 years old. Since then, I've always climbed. At University I started climbing lamp posts, often after a night out, and just before coming to Southeast Asia I climbed a lamp post when I was hanging out with my best friend. The bamboo at the riverside bar looked approximately the same size as a lamp post and it had been a while since anyone had climbed the top. Jan and I head over. I get to the top without too much difficulty - it's the getting down that's hard because it's slippery and you can't slow yourself down before hitting the ground. Someone comes over and shouts over the music, "you get a free bucket for that!". I go to the bar and claim my prize, a bucket of vodka and Sprite. Jan manages the same.

At the next bar there aren't many people, so a quick drinking race between Jan and James on one team (James is a Stray traveler that joined our quartet at the second bar) and Rachelle, Charlotte and me on the other team. My team loses the race.

The fourth bar has a few more people in it and we spend some time there. I do a flip off the side into the river. When we come to leave, our tubes have been stolen. Apparently, that happens a lot whilst tubing. We have to get to the next bar tubeless. Once there, we don't get drinks and just steal tubes that are there, moving on to the next bar swiftly.

The fifth bar we go to has a huge water slide. You buy a drink to get a smiley face painted on your hand in nail varnish and you're allowed to use the slide. Rachelle goes first whilst I hold the beer. Without enough momentum, she comes to a stop just before the end and has to jump off. Then I go up and try to do a front flip off it. I don't know what went wrong, or what I ended up doing, but hitting the water hurt and the picture Rachelle took didn't look like I was doing a front flip at all.

We spent a lot of time at that bar, no tubes again. It's getting late so we worry. Swimming to the next bar we find no tubes, cut our losses and get a Tuk-Tuk home. At this point it's just Rachelle, Charlotte and me, because Jan and James went missing.

Losing the tubes is bad because you lose your deposit - 60,000 Kip each. However, when we get to the tube rental, another Tuk-Tuk arrives and Rachelle steals three tubes from the top. We get out deposit back, minus 20,000 Kip for bringing them back late. A girl from the Tuk-Tuk starts arguing with Charlotte after seeing Rachelle taking the tubes even though there were clearly more tubes on the Tuk-Tuk than people riding in it. I stay out the argument and things get resolved. During the argument we meet a British couple and we all go to a bar for food and drinks.

I don't know how it happened, but at the bar, Rachelle and I ended up in a cake fight with a group of children aged between 3 and 12 years old. they smeared cake all over our faces and we chased them around the bar. I also entered a pool competition under the pseudonym 'Sven', but did very badly.

Last Day in Luang Prabang

It's my first day at Ernst and Young. I wake up at 8:45AM, leaving me only 15 minutes to get to work. I open my wardrobe hastily to put on my suit, but I can't find a jacket and trousers that match. With no time, I put on the uncoordinated attire. The jacket is also too big, but it will have to do. I need to find a tube station. I'm running round frantically, all flustered, and I don't know where one is, so I run into a shop and ask. When I finally find one, it turns out there are major problems on the line - they've moved the trains overground. When I get to one, it's very busy. Just as I begin to look for a seat, I realise I've forgotten my bag, which I need for work. I have to get off the train and as I walk along the side of it, I'm finding 50p coins - people must have dropped them whilst waiting for the train. I'm so late. 

When I get back to the flat to get my bag, someone is there who I know, who has been working for Ernst and Young already for some time. He has lots of yellow envelopes. I explain to him about my situation, but there's nothing he can do for me. Now past midday, there's no point in going to work.

That's when I wake up. Rachelle and I have both been having very vivid dreams; a symptom of the malaria pills. They are very rarely positive, although Rachelle did have one about running around a shopping mall with Kevin Spacey. Neither of us like them.

It's boiling hot and uncomfortably so. I can't be sure if the past two days were equally hot because we had the waterfalls to cool down in, but today we're staying in the city so there will be no cooling down. It's our last day in Luang Prabang, therefore, we see it fit to have the American Breakfast again. Then we move to a cafe and have drinks, whilst we wait for the museum to open at 1.30PM. It costs 20,000 Kip entry and after we're in they tell us Rachelle has to wear a long skirt. She's not wearing one, which means she has to rent one for 2,000 Kip. How sneaky of them.

The museum is an old palace that the Kings of Lao lived in over time. To me it just looks like a big house. Inside are mainly cabinets of small Buddha statues (as if we haven't seen enough of those) some bed-sofa things and metal drums. I'm not too impressed. It doesn't look like the king had very much. Other cabinets have gifts from other countries in them. China gave swords, Australia gave a boomerang and America arrogantly gave a small model of the space pod used to land on the moon. I see this as almost insulting, because Lao certainly can't afford a space program. Anyway, the museum wasn't worth any Kip in my opinion.

We spent the rest of the day moving around cafes, feeling too hot to do much else. In the evening we meet Charlotte and Jan for food at Utopia. After we've eaten, the Australian couple who were in the Stray Bus group, but left us at the border, walk in with a large group of other Stray Travelers. They've all arrived today and some are leaving tomorrow morning with us, so we sit with them. Utopia has a volley ball pitch, which I've been itching to use, but never had a group large enough to play with. After coming back from the toilet they're all playing, so I join them, whilst Rachelle chats to Charlotte and Jan. I played okay for a short person.

Kuang Si Falls, Again

I wake up with no sign of last night's market buffet causing me any stomach problems. It was all vegetarian so maybe the fuss I made was unnecessary. Yesterday, Rachelle and I enjoyed Kuang Si falls so much that we agreed to go again if the weather was nice. A quick check outside and she gives the green light for swimwear. This time we decide to go early, in hope of beating the crowds.

A short walk down the street and a Tuk-Tuk driver offers us a ride at 30,000 Kip each. This is what we paid yesterday and it's a good deal. He tells us that the price is cheaper because he has four others waiting to go - the price goes down the more people there are. We jump in the back and are supposedly going to pick up the other four passengers. Forty minutes later and there are no passengers. This frustrated Rachelle and I, because the idea was to get to the waterfall early. We complain and eventually he tells us we can go with his friend in a mini van, which has ten others going in it. We renegotiate the price at 20,000 Kip each and hop in the front. No one is in the back and I get agitated again. Five minutes later the others show up. Finally we can go. Before we set off the driver says, "you pay now! You pay now, it's okay". We refuse bluntly. The idea is that it's a round trip, so giving them the money up front would leave no incentive for the driver to wait for us at the waterfall if he felt like driving off. The group of ten pay half each as a compromise, but we get away without paying anything yet.

When we arrive at Kuang Si, we think it wise to go to the pool that gets busy - the one with the swing rope and waterfall you can jump off.As hoped, only two people are at the pool. We spend a lot of time there; we jump off the waterfall holding hands, I do my front flips off it and we take pictures near some bamboo that grows out of the water whilst small fish nibble at our feet. When the crowds inevitably arrive, we head up to the large main waterfall to have another look.

Something we didn't notice yesterday was a trail leading up to the top of the waterfall, which I found surprising because it's a long way to the top. We decide top go up it - Rachelle in flip flops and me in bare feet, struggling through the heat on a steep dirt trail to the top. It seems to take forever and when we near the top, some Australians warn us that the water at the top has leeches in it. I'm not okay with this. I'm afraid of leeches. I know they are fairly harmless and just drop off after taking some blood, but I don't like the idea of them. When Rachelle and I get to the top, I am too afraid to cross the water to go down the other side, so we go back the same way. I wasted half an hour for us both. 

On the way down a huge jumping spider lands on my foot before jumping again into the leaves next to the dirt trail. Already feeling uneasy from the leeches, it freaks me out a bit, but I'm also glad to have seen it. After reaching the bottom again, we dip in the quieter waterfall pools before heading back. 

The evening was spent in a cafe, then restaurant and then two bars. We tried a bar called hive, but Rachelle didn't like the toothpaste tasting cocktails. So instead, we went back to Lao Lao Garden bar from last night. Then it was bed time.

Kuang Si Falls

We get up really late. I think we're catching up on lost sleep. It's also particularly hard to wake up with no sign of natural light; unavailable due to a windowless room. What we do today is based on the weather, so I throw on some clothes to check outside. It's very bright and very hot - finally. The past two days have seen rain and cloudy skies. I change into swimwear and Rachelle puts on hers. We have breakfast before negotiating a Tuk-Tuk. 

We are going to the Kuang Si (Kuangxi) waterfall. There are two waterfalls in the Luang Prabang area and Kuang Si is the larger of the two and considered the best in Lao. Once again, my love for waterfalls makes me very excited as we ride for 40 minutes in the back of a large Tuk-Tuk with five other people. We arrive and pay the 20,000 Kip entry free. Following a dirt path through the forest terrain, we come to a small Sun Bear sanctuary. I am more excited about the waterfall than some sleeping Sun Bears, so we move on quickly. As we walk, there are streams flowing everywhere, a clue that we are close; then we see the first swimming area. A small, but wide, waterfall flows into the pool, filling it with light blue water. The cold water is refreshing on such a hot day. After a while, we carry on up the dirt path to another swimming area with a more exciting waterfall. All these waterfalls flow into each other in tiers as we get closer and closer to the end waterfall. The second tier is peaceful, with few people in it and I climb up the waterfall and sit on the top, followed by Rachelle.

The next tier is the main swimming area. It's very busy compared to the first two tiers and for good reason. There is a swing rope on a tree where you can launch yourself into the deep water. You can also get on to the medium-large waterfall (probably 3 meters high) and jump into the pool from there. I do a couple of swings in and a couple of front flips off the waterfall. Rachelle jumps off too. The place is a bit like a water park, except stunningly beautiful and made by nature. 

We venture up the dirt path further, passing another small swimming area and some  waterfall tiers that you are not allowed to swim in when we eventually get to the source of all the water; one huge, tall waterfall. It's impressive. You definitely can't go in this one like the one we visited in Thailand. You would be crushed and killed by all the water I imagine. It is a great sight though. Kuang Si is definitely my favourite place we've been to so far. It's like my paradise - nothing but beautiful forest, streams and blue waterfall pools. I love it here.

After three hours we have to meet the Tuk-Tuk and regrettably head home, but the timing is good because the daily rainfall begins. That night, Rachelle makes me eat food at the market because it's a cheap buffet - fill your plate for 10,000 Kip (1 English pound). I'm not thrilled with the idea because I don't trust the food and I'm scared flies will have been landing on it all night. I eat it, begrudgingly. Thereafter, we research the local bars in our Lonely Planet book and choose Lao Lao Garden. It's nice, gives a free shot on entry, 2 for 1 cocktails and cheap beer, all by candle light. We order french fries for a snack.

Is This France?

We are staying in Luang Prabang for five nights, so this morning we have the chance to sleep in. After so many early mornings and so much bus (and boat) travel, we are grateful. We then head off for food, ordering an American breakfast. It consists of half a baguette, a slice of ham, two slices of bacon, two eggs, two sausages, orange juice and tea. I swap my tea for Rachelle's orange juice, because I don't drink it. We put all the ingredients into the baguette and it's amazing. I wouldn't write about it if it wasn't.

Luang Prabang is where you really see the french influence from when it was colonised. The architecture is undoubtedly french. Buildings all have shuttered windows, there are baguette and crepe stalls everywhere, cake shops and children playing badminton in the street. It's almost like France, if french people were Asian. The good thing about it is that the religion, language and general culture remain unchanged. France just taught them a thing or two and left the rest as it was. 

In the afternoon we relax in a very french cafe eating cakes and drinking hot chocolate. It's been raining all morning and into the afternoon, so we don't do very much, and we don't have to.

As the evening descends, we go to the top of the hill which sits in the middle of Luang Prabang. We go up lots of steps to get to the top where there is a temple and spectacular views of the city. Beyond are the green mountains that make up Lao. We watch the sun set before making our way back down where we plan to hit the night market.

Every single night, at about 5PM, stalls begin to set up on the middle street of the main three streets. The street is long and the stalls go on forever. Strangely they all sell the same things and it's clearly aimed at tourists; you get a stall for silk scarves, one for Lao tea, clothes, notebooks, slippers, jewelry, ornaments, lanterns, paintings and so on. They repeat themselves all the way to the end. It's a place to haggle - essentially, the rule in Asia is that if it has a price tag, you pay that price, but if it hasn't got one, you haggle. I buy a notebook made from recycled paper, a t-shirt that says, "SAME SAME" on the front and, "BUT DIFFERENT" on the back, and lastly, I buy some thin, baggy, harem- type pants. Rachelle buys two pairs of the pants for herself. Neither of us had to spend much, but I think Rachelle did a better job of haggling.

To end the night we meet up with Charlotte (one of the girls traveling on the Stray bus) for a drink at the bar from last night. After a beer for me and Rachelle's cocktail, we try a hibiscus flower drink that supposedly lowers your blood pressure. It didn't, but it did taste like weak Ribena.

Thousands of Buddha

We wake up and it seems that no bugs of any sort have entered our net fortress. A look around the room suggests they have all gone somewhere else, not a single cockroach to be seen. We pack our things and go for breakfast. We get a break from the bus today and are traveling by boat. The bus is to meet us in Luang Prabang so we dump our heavy rucksacks in it, bringing only some hand luggage. The boat is long and thin - two car seats wise and there are literally car seats bolted to the floor to sit on. It's actually quite comfortable. Rachelle and I get seats at the front, which we would come to regret.

I'm very tired but the scenery keeps me awake. More beautiful mountains with clouds surrounding them pass us by. unfortunately these clouds grow, cover the sky and pour down rain. The boat has a roof, but because Rachelle and I are sat at the front, rain still gets us wet and the cool breeze makes us uncomfortably cold. It's the coldest we've been since we got to Southeast Asia (apart from the showers). Thankfully, our guide Tony makes room at the back and we sit there, a lot more sheltered. I nod off every now and again for two hours. 

We eventually make a stop at  some caves that go into a mountain. The boat pulls up and we jump out. The caves are filled with Buddha statues, some of them very old. There are thousands; all shapes and sizes. It's a nice little break from the river cruise. When we get back in the boat it has stopped raining.

Another hour and a half later, going from the Nam Ou to the Mekong and we arrive at Luang Prabang, the orange Stray bus waiting for us with our bags. We check in to a very basic, but cheap, guest house. The room has no windows, but a proper toilet and only costs five pounds a night between the two of us. 

We get food, explore the city and the night market. There are three very long main streets in Luang Prabang, making it very easy to navigate: expensive hotels on one, restaurants and night market (only at night) on the second and some bars on the third. Our guest house is on the third too. Later we meet two of the others traveling with us and head to a bar called Utopia. It's very chilled out. We sit on mats on the floor with a low table, drinking whilst music plays and a projector shows random videos of base jumping, wildlife and such things. The other two inform us that Tony, our guide who took us to Luang Prabang from Chiang Mai, is actually English, which is odd because of his Australian accent and Australian catch phrases.